Remember your family meetings! Family meetings are the core of Teaching Self-Government. If you have weekly family meetings, the whole family will stay focused on their family government. See what happens when you miss a few weeks, it’s noticeable. In my home it’s especially noticeable with Dad. He has less patience and focus as a parent when we miss our family meetings.
Family Meeting Tips Read More »
When one of our foster daughters lived with us years ago, she did something that the others hadn’t done. She spent the first few weeks very intently watching me. She watched the way I kept house, the way I parented my children, the time I spent reading scriptures and good books, etc.
Who Wants Realistic? Read More »
When I started learning self-government principles years ago, I was foster parenting some difficult children, most of whom were on medication and had severe anger issues and terrible eating habits.As I started teaching them self-government skills, many of the children no longer needed their medication. Sometimes the anger issues stopped immediately, but in other children the issues re-surfaced later. With these youth I looked at another aspect of self-government: their diet.
The Potential Nutrition Cure for “Difficult Children” Read More »
When my son was 12, he sang barbershop with his dad and grandpa.A few nights a week they had long rehearsals.One night, my son didn’t get to bed until midnight after a rehearsal.He slept in the next morning and realized he missed helping the Boy Scouts deliver flags for Pioneer Day.He said, “I guess I was just too tired to get up.”
Communication: More Than Talking Read More »
A reader once wrote asking about her children, ages 2, 4, 6 and 8. The children were usually very well-behaved in situations away from home. The mom tried to expose them to different places so they would know how to behave.
Dealing with Negative Social Influences Read More »
Triathlon vs. Parenting: The Comparisons Read More »
Many years ago I co-directed a youth theater production of Shakespeare’s “The Tempest.” On our last day of performances, we had a matinee and an evening performance. The matinee performance started under lots of stress. We were missing our stage hand, our sound person and two actresses, and everyone was stressed. The only thing we had time to do was say a prayer. We usually took time getting into character and doing energy-building exercises before a performance, but we didn’t have time that day. The play had to go on.
Lights, Camera, Action… with Energy! Read More »
Dear Nicholeen,I attended your seminar in Bountiful.I certainly had many other choices about how to use that time and I am very glad that I chose to come.I glanced at your blog the day before and because of that I took the time to speak with and hug my upset daughter before leaving, even when I thought I was already running late.I didn’t miss a thing and I was so glad that I took time for her.
Voice Tone: How Do You Sound? Read More »
When I was about thirteen years old I was perfectly molded in the opinions of the current society. I had my life all planned out, and was sure that my plans were socially pleasing to all of my friends. I was also sure that my plans would ensure that I wouldn’t turn out like my
Mother’s Day Miracle: My Story Read More »
People always ask me how they can change their voice tone. Well, since I had to figure that out for myself years ago, while doing foster care, I thought it should share the three ways of speaking with you too. Listen to this short audio clip about choosing your voice tone and how to recognize
Support Group: Finding Your Effective Voice Tone Read More »
Thisweek’s Gem is on remembering the most important thing during theholidays or any time of the year – the relationships. Myfavorite quote from this Gem is this: Thereally powerful vision-driven type person enjoys the serving part;enjoys the creating. She draws happiness from the joy that she’sgiving away! Right Click To Download Merry Christmas from us
Audio Gem: Holiday Traditions Read More »
Anticipating Daddy Dates by Nicholeen Peck Memories are priceless! And, memories with daddy are extraspecial. I know not all households have daddies, so if there isn’t adaddy at your house you can apply this article to mommies, grandmas,and grandpas too. When I was young my daddy deliberately made time each week to takeone of his
Anticipating Daddy Dates Read More »
What are you doing for ThanksgivingDay? Do you go to grandma’s house or do you cozy up at home? Nomatter what you do, or how large or small your group is there aresome simple fun things you can do to make Thanksgiving day fun. In this article I am going to sharewith you some old
Thanksgiving Day Fun! Games And Activities Your Family Will Beg For Read More »
The human voice is amazing! Think of all the things it can do. It can whisper, laugh, make animal noises, talk, sing, and yell. All these different voice tricks are useful in communicating and connecting or disconnecting with each other. Yelling can be used for connecting or disconnecting. If I can’t find my child in
Yelling At My Family: How To Break The Habit Read More »
“What if the Revolutionary War never happened?” “Then cows would sing at baseball games.” or “What if sausage was a health food?” “Then everyone would wear red shoes on Wednesdays.” What? Does any of this make sense to you? That’s the whole point. This hilarious game was taught to me this last week by my
What If? —A Great Game For A Hilarious Family Activity! Read More »
About 75 years ago, ten year old Tommy Monson had a Sunday School teacher only six years older than he was named Phyllis Bowden. Even though Phyllis was young, she knew the fundamentals of being a teacher to young children and took her role and responsibility seriously. So, when young Tommy became “quite fond of spit wads” Phyllis knew how to handle the problem. When Tommy wouldn’t stop his bad behavior Phyllis sent him to the bishop’s office to talk about the issue.
It Doesn’t Have To Be That Way: Role Reversal Read More »
Buzz, buzz! “Why won’t the flies stop buzzing around my head?” I wondered as I sat out in the mountain shade trying to digest my new book. First one, then four, all buzzing around my head. It seemed like it was a dance for them, and it looked like a dance for me. I was waving my arms every which way trying to get the pesky insects to leave me alone. I didn’t do anything to them.
How To Control Your Emotions Read More »
Were there dangers for children back in the old days? Did parents worry about keeping their children safe from social ills like we do today?
Old Fashioned Solutions For Modern Day Parenting Problems Read More »
Changing family structure can be difficult. Our parenting habits probably started in our childhood. And, even when we promised we wouldn’t do the same thing, practice the same negative parenting styles, we don’t always know a different way. There are multiples types of family structures out there to choose from.Since there are many some parents can get overwhelmed.
How do parents know if the chosen structure will actually work?
Nicholeen and Spencer Peck
Family Structure Definition: Nicholeen Peck on TV Read More »
There are many ways to show love for family members. However, in our family, we don’t write to each other as much as we talk to each other or do acts of service. So, for one of our family activities we decided to make a family mail system.
You’ve Got Mail! Love Note Ideas Read More »
(This article contains Nicholeen’s daily home and school schedule for this coming year & a video of how she makes a yearly plan forthe family.)
We have all heard the term “super mom” before. Some people have a positive association with the term. They think, “Wow, that lady is amazing. I want to be a super mom like her.” And, some have a negative association with the term.
Preparing For School With An Ex-Super Mom & My Homeschool Schedule Read More »
Each week I hold a special telephone mentor call for people who are enrolled in my Teaching Self-Government 10 Step Implementation Course. During these calls I personally answer people’s parenting questions. On this week’s call a very profound question was asked.
How To Stop Nagging? ~Help For Parents Read More »
Family activity nights are big deals at our house! Not that we spend a lot of money or anything, but we do keep them a big priority. We know that having regular family activities keeps our family relationships fresh. The night gives us something to talk about and look forward to.
Here are is a list of our top ten activities which don’t really cost anything:
1- “Knock Your Socks Off”
Family Night Ideas: Our Top Ten Affordable Activities Read More »
If you are tired of teenage attitudes and problems this is something you will want to know. www.iamnotateenager.com has a free book preview written by youth for teens. The book shows teenagers there is a different way to be. They can be “youth” instead. There is a difference.
Help For Teenagers: “I am NOT a teenager!” Read More »
Many people ask me what we do for Christmas and how we keep the family feeling united during all the hustle and bustle of the holidays.One of those ways is traditions.I am excited to have an article for you about some of the Peck family’s favorite traditions. Family traditions are so important for fostering love
Christmas Traditions Your Family Will Love Read More »
For a while now I have been meaning to address this issue. It is a large issue facing teens, parents, and whole families these days. While I know there are many opinions on when and how people should engage in sexual activity, I subscribe to the opinion that no teenager is ready for the commitment
Sexually Active Teens: How To Find Out And Be Proactive Read More »
So many people ask me how to control their out of control children… A man I really admire named Jeffrey Holland said, “…the only real control in life is self control.” I couldn’t agree more. You can control the settings on your computer, and control the television choices that come into your home. You can control all the things on your Family Standard and you can control what your family eats for dinner, but you can’t control another person. No matter how hard you try and how much power you try to look like you have, the only person you can control is yourself. Since that is the case, we should capitalize on that power we have to control ourselves, or govern ourselves. If we
Real Control! -Help For Parents Read More »
The opposite of calm is hurry. If you feel like you have to hurry all the time, then you will never be calm. Also, if you feel like you have to hurry through your teaching interactions with your children then you will also have a harder time staying calm. Don’t let your desire for being efficient ruin your ability to be calm. The great philosopher William Jordan said:
The first sermon in the world was preached at the Creation. It was a Divine protest against Hurry. It was a Divine object lesson of perfect law, perfect plan, perfect order, perfect method. Six days of work carefully planned, scheduled and completed were followed by,–rest.
We used you family standard made some changes and put it in our family book. My question is, do you have a family mission statement?
I am so glad you liked the standard. Ours is also in our family meeting book. Here is our family mission statement: ~Nicholeen
Our Mission Statement Read More »
I was recently asked if I thought I was a strict parent. I’ve never liked the word strict, because I associat it with a parent who yells a lot, is stern looking and engages in power struggles. So, in response to the question, I said, “I wouldn’t use the word strict to describe me, but I would say I am firm.” I shared these thoughts about the word strict with a wise friend of mine. She looked me in the eye and said, “You are wrong about people who are strict. A strict parent DOESN’T HAVE TO YELL.” All of a sudden I wondered if the semantics of the word strict have been chang
After moving to a new neighborhood, many years ago, I found myself talking to a nice woman about who the different families were who lived around me. I couldn’t wait to get acquainted with everyone, and her information about the names of families and what age children lived in what homes was very informative for
The “Perfect Family” Read More »
Family activities don’t necessarily need to be elaborate! I am a bit of a romantic, so I always try to think up things that sound memorable.
Tonight we drove around our small town until we found a place that had a lot of leaves that needed to be raked up. We made the ever traditional huge pile of leaves and jumped in, rolled around, buried each other, took pictures, and wrestled a bit. Soon it was time to go. (the draw back of daylight savings time) We decided that we didn’t want to be done. We wanted to take the fun home with us. So, we quickly went home to get some strong garbage
Tomorrow our family has to leave early for the day. While driving the car tonight I realized that we didn’t have any gas, and if we had to get gas tomorrow morning, we would probably end up running late for our appointments. So, I decided to take some time this evening to re-fuel the car. As I was standing at the pump, I realized that I am not much different than a car. I also need re-fueling from time to time in order to be a happy, healthy mom; the kind of mom that can keep running all day. We all need a little time to re-fuel on a regular basis. I used to take a whole day each m
“My husband and I are listening to your CDs. We’ve heard you speak a few times but never got the whole thing before. Your CDs are definitely an answer to prayer. I’ve tried for a long time to figure out how to get my husband on board, but he always gets so BORED, lol! After listening to the first CD, I realized that I’m definitely the big dreamer/big picture/live for the moment type, and he’s the line drive/details/planner type – no wonder my efforts didn’t work. I had a big picture but no good details on how we were going to get there. Having the CDs gives my husband
The number one mission Read More »
“How do you take away all privileges from younger kids? My 3.5 year old is really pushing… This post was the first time I really understood the “lose all privileges for 24 hours” thing. I can figure out how to do that with my 6 and 8 year olds, but the younger ones, I just can’t see it. Can you give me a visual please?
Should 3 year old lose privileges for 24 hours too? Read More »
“Another question I had was, does the rule of 3 start over for each incident? Are the 3 consequences for staying out of instructional control as relating to the first incident? I just want to make sure I understand correctly. So if a child hits his brother, and gets out of instructional control and has the consequences for that earlier in the day, and then later disobeys about something different, the rule of 3 would start over for the later incident, correct? Consequences aren’t cumulative for different offenses, so that because the child got to SODAS with hitting his brothe
Using the Rule of Three Read More »
“I was just wondering, when trying to set up this type of family government for the first time, does it take several family meetings before you can actually implement it? You talk about how each meeting shouldn’t be longer than 20 minutes, but if I’m understanding properly, to begin we need to talk about a family vision, come up with a mission statement, teach everyone the four basic skills (and practice them), and create a family standard…all the things seem to build on each other, so it sounds like it would take longer than twenty minutes to go through all of it properly bef
I was sitting on the couch today going over plans for our next trip when my six year old daughter, Londyn, sat down next to me and said, “We have to go to Virginia because you want to make the world better, don’t you? Not just our family, but other families too.” I said, “Yes” and smiled. I didn’t need to say anything else. It was very clear to me that she had developed an understanding of my mission. As a family, we talk about mission a lot. We try to analyze what other people’s missions might be. We talk about what kinds of skills we need to develop to find our personal mission
Mission By Example Read More »
In order to teach our children how to govern themselves in a family setting, we have to give them a vision, or picture of what the family is workingtoward. This vision, or goal, begins the family’s mission. The vision, goal, or dream is the first thing the family starts with to acheive mission. The concept of personal mission and family mission is both inspiring and overwhelming. Will it be hard to do? Why were we picked for this mission? Why don’t I have my personal mission yet? The list of questions could continue. I have found a book that tells a parable about mission.
Have A Mission Book Read More »
