TSG site logo
Menu

Nicholeen Peck

sad and upset woman deep in thought

How Faith Impacts Parenting: Finding Hope, Peace, and Connection

Leave a Comment / Relationships, TSG Principles /

Parenting is not about achieving perfection—it is about progressing together as a family. When we approach parenting with faith, we invite God to be an active participant in our journey. Faith transforms our perspective, strengthens our connection with our children, and inspires us to act with hope and courage. As we rely on God’s grace and practice self-government, we become better equipped to guide our children toward truth, love, and lasting change. Let us embrace the journey of parenting with faith, knowing that with God, all things are possible.

How Faith Impacts Parenting: Finding Hope, Peace, and Connection Read More »

AdobeStock_48877430

Quality, Quantity and Conformity: How Much Time Do Kids Really Need?

Leave a Comment / All, Relationships /

For years, sociologists, governments and parents have been trying to determine whether the amount of time a parent spends with their child actually matters for the child’s success in life. How are we to know what’s best for our children and our families? We don’t need charts or questionnaires; we just need to look around

Quality, Quantity and Conformity: How Much Time Do Kids Really Need? Read More »

Happy Family of 3

Family Meeting Tips

Leave a Comment / All, Home Culture, Using TSG Skills /

Remember your family meetings! Family meetings are the core of Teaching Self-Government. If you have weekly family meetings, the whole family will stay focused on their family government. See what happens when you miss a few weeks, it’s noticeable. In my home it’s especially noticeable with Dad. He has less patience and focus as a parent when we miss our family meetings.

Family Meeting Tips Read More »

AdobeStock_104717703

The 9-Year-Old Dawdler Dilemma

Leave a Comment / All, Children (4-10), Using TSG Skills /

I’m in need of some help with my nine-year-old son. He is a major dawdler, and always has been. I am a very efficient person and try to get things done as quickly as possible. See the conflict already? It takes gobs of time for him to do simple things like get dressed, brush teeth, eat breakfast, read his books, and other things that are very simple. He’ll start the task, but then literally just start walking around the house in circles, just doing nothing in particular except dawdling.

The 9-Year-Old Dawdler Dilemma Read More »

fear

OCDs and Fears

Leave a Comment / All, Relationships, TSG Principles, Using TSG Skills /

I once received a note from a mother who had an eight-year-old son with obsessive tendencies. He was scared the upstairs of the house would break and drop everyone into the basement, so he constantly checked that the floor was strong enough. And this wasn’t the first time he had fixated on something. The mom was nervous because she had a family history of mental illness. Her husband wasn’t as worried because he believed most mental problems are created by a family’s discipline and relationships. He said that developing perfectionist children who govern themselves caused their son to obsess over things. She asked my advice on how to help her son through his obsessive thoughts and actions.

OCDs and Fears Read More »

girl eating yogurt

The Potential Nutrition Cure for “Difficult Children”

8 Comments / All, Home Culture, Relationships /

When I started learning self-government principles years ago, I was foster parenting some difficult children, most of whom were on medication and had severe anger issues and terrible eating habits.As I started teaching them self-government skills, many of the children no longer needed their medication. Sometimes the anger issues stopped immediately, but in other children the issues re-surfaced later. With these youth I looked at another aspect of self-government: their diet.

The Potential Nutrition Cure for “Difficult Children” Read More »

woman and little boy reading at opposite ends of a park bench

Communication: More Than Talking

Leave a Comment / All, Home Culture, Relationships, Using TSG Skills, Youth (10-18) /

When my son was 12, he sang barbershop with his dad and grandpa.A few nights a week they had long rehearsals.One night, my son didn’t get to bed until midnight after a rehearsal.He slept in the next morning and realized he missed helping the Boy Scouts deliver flags for Pioneer Day.He said, “I guess I was just too tired to get up.”

Communication: More Than Talking Read More »

Selfish

A Whole Selfish Family

Leave a Comment / All, Relationships /

A week ago, I was standing in the kitchen canning peaches, and my whole family atmosphere fell apart all around me in a matter of five minutes. 

My son was asked by his father to help with something in the back yard.  My son didn’t want to do it, so he decided to have an attitude problem about it.  My husband was stressed, and chose to get upset, instead of teach to the situation correctly.  (We all have our moments of weakness from time to time.) 

My daughter was supposed to be cleaning her room, and was playing her piano instead.  She had lost focus.  (She is ten, this happens sometime

A Whole Selfish Family Read More »

Yellow Canary on barbed wire fence

I’m Not Looking!

Leave a Comment / All, Home Culture, Relationships, TSG Principles /

A while ago,I was driving down the highway looking at the clear blue sky and the snow-capped mountains.A bird with a bright yellow head and a black body was perched on a wooden fence on the side of the road.The mountains were so beautiful.The spring flowers were starting to bloom.The radio played my favorite classical music station.The drive felt calm, like a dream.

I’m Not Looking! Read More »

Angry little girl

Ah, 3-Year-Olds!

Leave a Comment / All, Toddlers (0-4), Using TSG Skills /

I once heard from a mother who was struggling with her three-year-old. The girl didn’t take “No” answers well, even when they practiced. When she earned a consequence she either wouldn’tdothe chore or would holler if it was the removal of a privilege.If the mother gave her a “No” answer to anything, the girl would flop on the floor and scream. If she didn’t get what she wanted from her siblings, she would yell and hit them.She was a sweet girl, but she was also very strong-willed and determined to get her way.

Ah, 3-Year-Olds! Read More »

Disciplining Child - AdobeStock_113985127

Parenting in Public

1 Comment / All, TSG Principles /

I’m often asked how to parent in public. So many parents are tired of being the only ones trying to get their kids to behave properly and having their kids’ friends look at them like they’re acting like the wicked witch. Parents want their kids to enjoy playing with friends, but that doesn’t mean they have to let their children misbehave or do things that are rude or inappropriate. It really boils down to knowing how to handle different expectations of children’s behavior.

Parenting in Public Read More »

Mother giving high five to daughter

Praising For Real

Leave a Comment / All, Relationships, Using TSG Skills /

I once had a reader say that praising didn’t come naturally for her. In fact, she thought praising seemed fake and annoying. She wrote:

I don’t want to be a cheerleader, always saying “Good job” no matter what—I want to say things that really matter, that I really believe, that are true. I guess what makes it hard is when I know (or think I know) that I’ve taught them how to do something better than they have done it, or that they should be capable of doing some things without always having to be praised for it.

Praising For Real Read More »

Child light bulb

Sometimes They Figure It Out Themselves

Leave a Comment / All, Using TSG Skills /

Several years ago, my family had a tradition of occasionally deciding we were on vacation for a week. That meant we took a break from our regular routine. We did it a few times a year to focus on getting all of the yard and garden work done. One day that we spent doing lots of yard work is particularly memorable, not because of what we accomplished in the garden, but because of what happened with my children.

Sometimes They Figure It Out Themselves Read More »

BoredBoy

Lights, Camera, Action… with Energy!

Leave a Comment / All, Relationships /

Many years ago I co-directed a youth theater production of Shakespeare’s “The Tempest.” On our last day of performances, we had a matinee and an evening performance. The matinee performance started under lots of stress. We were missing our stage hand, our sound person and two actresses, and everyone was stressed. The only thing we had time to do was say a prayer. We usually took time getting into character and doing energy-building exercises before a performance, but we didn’t have time that day. The play had to go on.

Lights, Camera, Action… with Energy! Read More »

Grumpy Children Doing Dishes

He Won’t Do His Chores?

Leave a Comment / All, Home Culture, Relationships, Using TSG Skills /

A few years ago, I received a letter from a woman regarding her nine-year-old son, Colin. Her problem was one that many other parents face. Colin regularly spent the entire day procrastinating his chores. On top of it all, he had a bad attitude. He was sent to bed early, which meant he didn’t do his chores and thought he got away with it. The house was messy because Colin didn’t wash the dishes, and the mom was at her wit’s end — how can the family work around a stubborn child who is constantly seeing how far he can push to get out of his responsibilities?

He Won’t Do His Chores? Read More »

MomAndDaughterCrouchTalk

Disagreeing Appropriately

Leave a Comment / All, TSG Principles, Using TSG Skills /

A few years ago, a reader wrote, “My kids love being able to disagree appropriately, but I don’t want them to do it every single time! They’re smart and have good reasons for wanting to do things a different way, and sometimes I’m happy to let them change our direction.But I don’t like taking the time to listen to their opinion every time I ask them to do something they don’t want to do.Suggestions?”

Disagreeing Appropriately Read More »

Girl making her bed

Morning Routine Motivation

1 Comment / All, Home Culture, Relationships /

2 – What kind of opportunities do you give for kids to follow through before getting consequences?

Example: It’s each of the children’s responsibility to make their bed, tidy their bedroom and get dressed before breakfast at 7:30.I try to say encouraging things to get the kids to hurry along by letting them know how much time has passed and how much is left before breakfast — even advertising what’s coming for breakfast to motivate them.But when they don’t do it, or don’t do it on time, I suddenly wonder what I should do.Do they miss breakfast?

Morning Routine Motivation Read More »

Stressed woman

Look Up!

Leave a Comment / All, Relationships /

One morning I woke up with this list of things to do that day on my mind.Ok, I didn’t plan on one of my children throwing up, but the rest was planned.Before I even got my swimsuit on to leave for the pool, I felt this tight feeling in my chest and my head started to ache.I tried taking some deep breaths to calm myself down, but itdidn’t seem to work. I kept going and thought my workout might relax me.

Look Up! Read More »

Laughing bedtime story

Properly Prioritizing Our Time… Because It’s All We Have!

Leave a Comment / All, Relationships /

One night, many years ago, I was faced with a decision. Should I write my daily blog, or should I sit in my daughter’s room telling exciting stories to my children? We had friends in town staying with us, and it was a tradition in our home that when friends come to stay, I gather them together and tell them one of my famous choose-your-own-ending type stories. The children were all very excited for storytime. I couldn’t let them down by choosing to write my blog post instead of spending time with the children. Then the thought hit me, “Wait a minute! I’m trying to decide between writing a blog vs. spending time with the children?? How could I even consider letting them down! Why would I ever choose to lose this time with my children just because I didn’t take the time earlier in the day to write my blog?”

Properly Prioritizing Our Time… Because It’s All We Have! Read More »

Mother talking to son

Respecting Property

Leave a Comment / All, Relationships, TSG Principles /

Some 10 years ago, my four-year-old son was standing on the back porchone afternoon,talkingto his sister.They weretrying to make each other laugh by doing funny things.This is a common game with the two of them.All of the sudden I heard a loud BANG on thewindow located right nextto the porch.I ran to the door and saw my four year old standing there holding a garden shovel, smiling and laughing with his sister.

Respecting Property Read More »

Mother and daughter arguing

Staying Focused on Correct Parenting Principles

1 Comment / All, Home Culture, Relationships, TSG Principles /

I remember one day talking with a dear friendabout parenting.She told me that for about a monthshe was doing so good with the Teaching Self-Government principles in her home.She said she really saw results whenever she remembered the principles and used them.Then she said that her family went on a trip for a week.On the way home from the trip, she stopped using the Teaching Self-Government principles.She said that for some reason she just went back to her old, inefficient way of running things at home.

Staying Focused on Correct Parenting Principles Read More »

Moon shining in the clouds and stars

Families Of Light

1 Comment / All, Home Culture, Relationships, TSG Principles /

“Mommy, what makes the moon shine?”askedmy six-year-old daughter, Londyn. “The moon reflects the light of the sun,” I responded. After a brief discussion about the moon and the sun, I realized that her question was really profound. Innocence almost always finds truth.I’m grateful for that.The moon reflects the light from the sun. It never turns its back on the sun either.It always faces it.The moon loses light when things get in the way, like the earth.The moon has the power to control the tides on the earth; the very thing that gets in the way.

Families Of Light Read More »

WomenSewing

Thanks to Pre-Teaching, Melanie Sees the Future

Leave a Comment / All, Relationships /

Years ago I was participating in a sewing activity at my church. Many women had gathered at the church with their sewing machines. At this activity, there was a four-year-old girl that kept touching the knobs on the sewing machines. Her mother tried to keep her in control and punished her by putting her into time-out when she touched the machines. She didn’t stop trying to touch the machines —even though this girl was punished each time .

Thanks to Pre-Teaching, Melanie Sees the Future Read More »

Father correcting son

Voice Tone: How Do You Sound?

Leave a Comment / All, Home Culture, Relationships, TSG Principles, Using TSG Skills /

Dear Nicholeen,I attended your seminar in Bountiful.I certainly had many other choices about how to use that time and I am very glad that I chose to come.I glanced at your blog the day before and because of that I took the time to speak with and hug my upset daughter before leaving, even when I thought I was already running late.I didn’t miss a thing and I was so glad that I took time for her.

Voice Tone: How Do You Sound? Read More »

BusinessManAndWomanHighFive

Praise for Parents!

Leave a Comment / All, Relationships /

I want to thank you all for your great comments over the years regarding your success and transformation as parents! It’s so good to hear your stories.  I’m constantly receiving emails with comments like, “I’m learning that I have the same behavior that bothers me about my child,” or “I have [this/that] weakness that I’m working on.” Please keep your comments coming. What amazing examples you are of parents who are focused on governing themselves. I hope you are all happier because of what you have chosen to see in yourselves. Recognizing a problem is the first step toward freeing yourself.

Praise for Parents! Read More »

Falling Dominos

The Law of Cause and Effect is True

Leave a Comment / All, Relationships /

“Cause and effect is as absolute and undeviating in the hidden realm of thought as in the world of visible and material things.”

We cannot change cause and effect no matter how hard we try.Bad will always produce bad for someone and good will always produce good for someone.The law of cause and effect is true, even if the someone isn’t the person doing the good or the bad.

The Law of Cause and Effect is True Read More »

Grumpy girl

Always Stay Consistent with Consequences Earned

Leave a Comment / All, Children (4-10), Using TSG Skills /

“Yesterday my 8 year old was grumpy when asked to do something, so he earned a negative consequence. I asked him to choose a job from the job jar.I explained that the job would help him change his heart.He then got very cheerful and said he was sorry for being grumpy… and wanted to be allowed to not do the job because he had changed (after all, he reasoned, the attitude was the reason for the extra job).

Always Stay Consistent with Consequences Earned Read More »

Bored Family

Loosen Up! It Makes Life Fun!

2 Comments / All, Home Culture, Relationships /

This comment was made by a blogger. My comments arebelow.

“Our family has serious lack of enjoyment issues. I think we just don’t know how to have fun because we are afraid to spend any money on frivolousness when we have debts to pay, and we have not done anything for so long, we don’t know what to do to just get away and have fun together.”

Family Activities don’t have to cost.

Loosen Up! It Makes Life Fun! Read More »

TalkingCalmly

“Every time you’re silly, somebody always gets hurt.”

1 Comment / All, Home Culture, TSG Principles, Using TSG Skills /

I was standing at the kitchen sink washing dishes, when all of the sudden the happy children noises from the basement changed into cries and yells. I remember distinctly hearing a sad noise or yell from each of my four children. Now, doing the dishes seemed fun compared with sorting out what happened in the basement. I dried my hands and took a deep breath. I wanted to make sure I was calmso that the obviously stressful situation wouldn’t control my emotions. A clear head and calm soul can change hearts and teach minds.

“Every time you’re silly, somebody always gets hurt.” Read More »

treebark

Freedom For Families: The Tree Bark Approach

3 Comments / All, Relationships, TSG Principles, Using TSG Skills /

“Give Me [Tree Bark], Or Give Me Death”: Liberty Yesterday And Today

No speech has ever stirred the American people so much as Patrick Henry’s “Give Me Liberty, or Give Me Death” speech. No matter if I see a professional orator perform it with eloquence, or a young child reciting that speech, it touches my heart with goodness and purpose.

Freedom For Families: The Tree Bark Approach Read More »

mother talking to younger children

Stepping Away From What They Believe

Leave a Comment / All, Relationships /

It’s hard to see a good family friend or loved one stray from the things you both know and believe. Things inevitably end up changing. The relationships become different and sometimes strained. However, you still want to stay close to them. How is that to be achieved? And, how do you break it to the children without them thinking these good people are not so good?

Stepping Away From What They Believe Read More »

Families in roller coaster car

Pre-Teaching For Summer Activities

Leave a Comment / All, Using TSG Skills /

Do you have some awesome family trips or activities planned for this Summer? It’s going to be the best Summer ever! However, what are you going to do when the children start acting out? TSG on the go is always a little harder than at home. How are you going to keep them calm, happy, and obedient? How will they stay by you when you’re in a crowded place?

Pre-Teaching For Summer Activities Read More »

AngerRoom

A Sign Our Society Needs Self-Government

Leave a Comment / All, Using TSG Skills /

On a recent plane flight I happened to open the magazine provided for passengers by the airlinein the seat back pocket. In the magazine there was an article titled “Break Room” about these“Anger Rooms” that are starting to pop up around the country.These Anger Rooms are proof of our society’s entitlement mindset. The business is based onthe idea that a person should be allowed to be as aggressive as they want to when they feel anemotion coming on, and not have to follow God’s law of cause and effect.

A Sign Our Society Needs Self-Government Read More »

TSGKenyaReport

Self-Government Teachers In Kenya Report In This Video

Leave a Comment / All, Home Culture, Using TSG Skills /

In November 2015 we visited Kenya and taught many religious leaders, teachers, social workers, family advocatesand parents how to teach self-government in Kenya. It was the first time we did a training like this outside of the United States. When we departed, we had a prayer in our hearts that the wonderful Kenyan TSG mentors

Self-Government Teachers In Kenya Report In This Video Read More »

JoyfulLivingImage

Nicholeen Talks About How She Lives Joyfully And MUCH More!

Leave a Comment / All, Home Culture /

Recently I was invited to be a guest speaker on the Joyful Living Podcast with Quinn Curtis. The presentation was completely new and really spontaneous! I think you will like it. Some of the topics covered are: Entitlement issues in children What joyful living looks like How to balance home life and work or other

Nicholeen Talks About How She Lives Joyfully And MUCH More! Read More »

DSC00959

Kenyans Show Gratitude For Self-Government Teachings: Our Report

Leave a Comment / All, Announcements, Home Culture /

“You have blessed our lives and our families so much.” “Thank you so much for coming to teach us! You have to come back. Kenya is a big place. We need more teachings like this.” “I have to admit that I never thought anything good ever comes from America. You have proven me wrong. This

Kenyans Show Gratitude For Self-Government Teachings: Our Report Read More »

HappyFamilyHug

How is Teaching Self-Government Changing the World?

Leave a Comment / All, Announcements /

Dear Teaching Self-Government Friends, Every year we’ve tried to do a “State of Teaching Self-Government” update for you. So much has been happening that we feel like it’s time for one of those updates — even though it’s not January yet. Ever since people started asking us to talk to them about the self-government principles

How is Teaching Self-Government Changing the World? Read More »

InsideOut

[Support Group Article Gem] Is Disney’s “Inside Out” Really “Outside In?”

Leave a Comment / All /

I know this article could ruffle a few feathers but I felt like my support group would reallyappreciate it even if they didn’t totally agree.I recently saw the new movie “Inside Out” and couldn’t help but analyze it. My husband alwaysteases me for how much I analyze movies. I actually just analyze everything. That is whatthinking people do. My brain is always searching for more truth or more traps. I guess it’s in myprograming.

[Support Group Article Gem] Is Disney’s “Inside Out” Really “Outside In?” Read More »

FatherSonSnuggle

Building Confidence Through Mercy and Advocacy, Not Abandonment

Leave a Comment / All, TSG Principles /

“So what exactly is self-government,” a woman asked me one day. “It is a principle of freedom that is taught by parents to their children. The parents create an environment that is filled with a loving, calm tone and a firm structure based on skills and cause and effect. This environment helps children take control

Building Confidence Through Mercy and Advocacy, Not Abandonment Read More »

Headstone on Memorial Day

[Support Group Audio Gem] Lessons Learned At The Graveside…

Leave a Comment / All /

Memorial Day is a very special day, especially in the United States. It is a special day to remember your loved ones that have passed on and to get together with family. It is on this day that I remember all of the stories I’ve learned about my ancestors. I get to tell them to my children and learn more from my family members.

[Support Group Audio Gem] Lessons Learned At The Graveside… Read More »

ChickenAndchild

Children Aren’t Chickens: A Discussion About Free-Range Parenting

Leave a Comment / All /

While visiting a friend’s house recently, I was asked this very interesting question. “What do you think about parents who let their children run wild and don’t even seem to notice? My neighbor doesn’t even stop her child from climbing my bookcases when they come for a play date. I think they call it ‘free-range’

Children Aren’t Chickens: A Discussion About Free-Range Parenting Read More »

madboy

How To Stop Bullying: Boundaries For Bullies!

Leave a Comment / All /

Question: How do you help children respond appropriately to unkind behavior and bullying, especially at school? Answer Bullying is on the rise in our society. Many factors may contribute to this trend, including the increased usage of violent video games and movies, and the decrease in social refinement instruction. Whatever the root causes, incidents of

How To Stop Bullying: Boundaries For Bullies! Read More »

stopsignBoy

Public Shaming — Is It Creative or Just Wrong?

Leave a Comment / All, Home Culture /

In recent months, there have been many news stories, YouTube videos and social media posts that show parents getting creative with their discipline techniques to get through to their children. Everyone wants to know if these creative measures are healthy or harmful. I would like to talk specificallyabout public shaming and its use as a

Public Shaming — Is It Creative or Just Wrong? Read More »

logo wide 1 scaled

Login

Login