“My daughter is so ungrateful! All I do is serve her, but she doesn’t care about me or what I feel. And, she never helps out, even when I ask nicely,” an exasperated mother told me about her teenage daughter. In a later conversation, Emily, the daughter said to me, “I never get anything my […]
Mindset Makes or Breaks Family Bonds Read More »
Love runs deeper than many people realize, and the outcomes of love are significant. We all recognize when we don’t feel loved or when we have a hard time feeling love for someone who isn’t behaving lovingly. But, what we don’t often recognize is that love isn’t something that can be turned on and off
Choosing kindness strengthens relationships, increases resilience and promotes emotional non-fragility, helps us solve problems, and is a choice that leads to happiness. Many parents tell me that they hope for their child to develop kindness. Indeed, kindness is a characteristic that develops. It’s a word that describes actions that display love or respect for others.
The Kindness Advantage Read More »
It may seem trite and slightly overused to say it, but the old adage, “Make every day Christmas,” has more power than you might think. In fact, maybe, just maybe, the way to have life feel like Christmas every day is to truly live the spirit of Christmas in our relationships at Christmas time. Practicing
Practice Good Relationships This Christmas Read More »
Nearly every day parents ask me how to help their “wayward young adult” or how to heal the heart of their “disconnected teen.” Children displaying unnatural affection by disconnecting from loving parents is an epidemic in our modern society. Normal human development involves increasingly seeking for autonomy as a person launches into adulthood. However, turning
Parents Want To Rescue Their Youth From Confusion Read More »
Families are concerned about their children who are struggling with stress and anxiety. Why are stress and anxiety so prevalent nowadays, and what can families do to help in loving ways? Understanding Stress and Anxiety Stress and anxiety are real feelings that many children suffer with daily. According to Georgetown University Health Policy Institute Center
7 Tips For Reducing Stress and Anxiety In Children Read More »
An exasperated mother said to me, “My teenager doesn’t like to work hard. She expects everything in life to be easy. How do I teach her to like work?” “Do you like work?” I asked the mother. “Most people who don’t see value in work, or don’t like work, are taught somewhere along the way
Two Ways To Guide Youth Toward Purposeful Living Read More »
When people don’t speak the same language, it’s hard to understand each other. Likewise, when parents and children don’t speak the same language, then they can become disconnected because of lack of understanding. Understanding creates a feeling of respect and bonding in relationships and is a vital component to creating family unity and solving family
The Vocabulary Gap And Its Effect On Families Read More »
Some people seem to be naturally patient, while others seem to struggle with increasing patience because of their strong/hard natures or how they were nurtured. However, when patience is more understood, we all might find that we’re taking more steps toward patience than we think we are. And, if we keep taking those steps, then
4 Steps For Increasing Your Patience Read More »
It’s currently commonplace to see youth aggressively confronting adults when, not too long ago, that behavior would never have been condoned. And, sadly this aggressive behavior is being misinterpreted as behavior necessary for the emotional safety of the child. If parents want to be the ‘safe place’ for their child, then it’s vital that they
Being Your Child’s Safe Place Read More »
“I think I ruined my child,” a mother told me in desperation as she explained some of the behavior problems and disconnection problems her teenage son was having. She was being honest with herself about mistakes that she might have made in her son’s upbringing. My heart ached for her. She might have unknowingly done
Self-Governed People Train Their Focus Forward Read More »
Mom has a bad knee, but that doesn’t stop us from making multi-generational memories to last a lifetime. Months ago, when I asked Mom to accompany me on a trip to Alaska, she said, “Sure, I’ll come if you really want me to go with you. I don’t move very fast anymore because of my
7 Lessons Aging Mothers & Grandmothers Teach Their Families Read More »
As nice as it would be to have complete control over outcomes, it isn’t humanly possible. Cause and effect is a principle of life that we can usually rely upon, but sometimes there seems to be another will for our days and experiences that turns our plans upside down. Sometimes these unexpected turns can create
When Things Don’t Go Your Way… Read More »
It sometimes seems like teens don’t want to listen to adults tell them what to do or not to do, but in reality, teens and children are always hoping that adults will teach them discernment. When a person doesn’t know who to follow or what to believe morally, then that person ends up feeling lost
Children & Teens Want to Know More From Parents: Teaching Discernment Read More »
As part of learning cause and effect and growing into healthy adulthood, most children occasionally test boundaries by willfully choosing disobedience or even rebelling against parents. While taking risks and being a little bit rebellious here and there are usually healthy signs of normal development toward adulthood, obedience is required for wisdom and learning, too.
Obedience To Parents Changes Hearts Read More »
Diplomacy is dying. MSN’s Feb 18, 2022 article called, “Is This The Year Of The Angry Parent? The GOP Hopes So,” talked about how parent anger about masks and social issues was helping the GOP and causing a problem. Yahoo News declared, “A parents’ revolt is currently sweeping the nation,” in their Feb 18, 2022
The Death of Diplomacy And The Impact On Children Read More »
Sharon and Michael always enjoyed their downtime in the evenings watching DIY, design, and food programs. They felt like their time together as a young married couple was meaningful and educational since they both loved creative projects, and they got the “downtime” they needed at the end their busy workdays. This nightly ritual quickly became
From TV-Addicted to Time Together! Read More »
Our youth are stuck in a social vortex that’s forever spinning ideas past them but never leading them to truth. Every person has an inborn desire to know why they are here, where they are going, and what life’s all about. Scientists and socialists, as well as academics and activists, all attempt to promote purpose
4 Simple Steps For Helping Youth Find Purpose In Life Read More »
Christmas stories are the best! They really have a way of teaching our hearts about the true meaning of Christmas, when the to-do lists seem to take over the month of December. Even though many of the best Christmas stories involve someone giving a gift, the stories aren’t really about giving. They are about something
The Key To Experiencing Christmas More Fully Read More »
Sadly, teaching strategies for proper social and emotional health are often unorganized and conflicting. Parents are left feeling like they need to choose between teaching children to have self-control and teaching children to be emotionally heard. These choices seem like opposites to most people. But, to a person who has true emotional intelligence, both of
One Easy Way To Increase Emotional Maturity In Children Read More »
We can’t afford to serve two masters anymore because our children’s hearts and minds are a prize to be won. For years now, society and media have dually honored both animalistic sexual license as well as humanely nurturing the innocence of children and admiring the goodness of God. Unsurprisingly, basic nurturing and some of God’s
Children, The Sexual Target? Read More »
Authentic grandparents who actively engage with their children and grandchildren establish a foundation of security and hope for the younger generations that can’t be found elsewhere. Grandpa had a boat and regularly took me and the rest of his large family out for rides and on water-skiing trips. These were fun memories, but one boating
A Global Need For Authentic Grandparents Read More »
When was the last time you felt lonely? In order to thrive during these socially unusual times, and even times that aren’t unusual at all, it’s important to understand the difference between being alone and experiencing real loneliness, and what we can do to combat the loneliness epidemic that seems to be sweeping many countries.
Combating the Loneliness Epidemic Read More »
An online school teacher was recently giving me the highlights of his career. He proudly told me that his favorite part of his job was that he gets to teach children discernment. I could see how this would be exciting for him but was also instantly concerned. A series of “what if” questions came to
Are You Teaching Children Discernment? Read More »
“That girl was so rude!” a girl about age 12 said to her mother as she skated off of the roller rink. Immediately her mother started toward the mother of the “rude” girl to tell her to control her daughter and to tell the daughter to apologize for her unkindness. This mother clearly loved and
Helping Children Deal With Offensive Situations Read More »
My views have changed. During my teen and young adult years, I thought that women needed to do everything men did, and women did, in order to be strong. But, now that I have seen every dimension of womanhood firsthand, I see that my views of women and myself lacked depth and understanding when I
Raising Daughters Into Strong Women A Different Way Read More »
Two to three times per day, my 17-year-old son spontaneously comes up to me as I’m coming down the hall or when I’m standing in the kitchen, and wraps his arms around me and gives me a tender, loving hug. “Oh, Mom…I love you,” he says. These hugs are some of the highlights of my
Hugs, A Habit of Heart Change Read More »
Parents and school administrators have requested that I make a short, free curriculum that parents can use to help their children navigate some of the social issues children are often forced to encounter at young ages. This curriculum is basic but deep, and it’s a principle-based lesson plan to help parents prepare their children to
Stand Out & Speak Up – Self-Government Principles For Our Day! (Curriculum) Read More »
The subject of anxiety can be confusing. Anxiety seems to be part of everyday conversation these days. I’ve heard some people shake their heads and call anxiety a “contagious, modern epidemic,” and yet I’ve seen many real, intense anxiety attacks that leave people worn out and hopeless. Some people say that anxiety is something a
Mixed Messages About Anxiety & Fragility Read More »
“Look Mom, this water bottle has a description. The water is described as ‘mouth-watering water,” said Porter with a chuckle. “This water calls itself smart, but I’m not sure that description seems very smart,” he added. This was too much for me. I completely broke down into a laughing attack over this ridiculous notion that
Want Bonding? How To Have More Laughs! Read More »
Chris W. shared this shocking story with me about his experience last week with his son at a California park. “My son and I were playing soccer at a park in the bay area of California. Multiple African American boys came up to my son and started punching him in the head for no reason.
Is Critical Race Theory Hurting Our Children? Read More »
There is a myth that parents from past generations didn’t understand or care about the feelings of their children as much as they should have or as much as modern parents do. This isn’t true. I’m never a fan of putting whole generations of people into boxes just because there are a few horror stories.
3 Ways to Deepen Family Bonds and Increase Emotional Understanding Read More »
An exasperated woman, whose marriage was falling apart, said to me, “Nicholeen, my husband is obsessed by principles. He keeps telling me that I don’t understand principles and that I’m not living by principles. How do you define principles?” This woman’s husband lived according to his own made-up rules, such as hiding things from the
Principle vs Practice For Family Unity Read More »
“I don’t have the time to catch every little thing the kids do. I run a business, I have a large family, and I homeschool. Isn’t there an easier way to stop the bad behaviors than having to correct every one of them? I think I need the condensed, quicker approach to parenting,” said Gwen,
Preparation —The Long View of Parenting Read More »
Think of the voices that surround our children. Voices leading children to love money, God, family, power, popularity, prestige, entitlement, activism, intellectual achievement, personal worth, truth, pleasure-seeking, time wasting, productivity, industry, judgment, despair, and more. It’s easy to see how some of these voices mislead and hurt a child’s potential. Yet, these voices oftentimes come
Hurting or Helping Children | The Battle For Hearts And Loyalties Read More »
A teenage girl talking back to her mother in an airport about her emotions said, “We have to let our emotions out. I’m being true to myself. I won’t stuff my emotions just because you don’t want to hear them!” The mother, who had told her daughter that she couldn’t use her phone anymore, was
Emotional Power Vs Emotional Bondage Read More »
Even though there seems to be more self-absorbed people around us than ever before, calling someone a narcissist may miss the mark. In fact, many people who seem to possess narcissistic behavior, might just be prideful. There is a difference. People all over the world share their relationship struggles and personal development goals with me
Narcissism, The New Normal? Read More »
Children need to feel love from their parents more than ever before. And, our neighbors need love too. That unconditional, deep and abiding love will help our children weather the storms of life. Love is the truth that fills the soul and gives life hope and meaning. Maybe, during this time of social and political
“I Love You No Matter What” Read More »
Relationships require selfless service to survive. Although there are multiple reasons people site for their relationship dysfunctions, from infidelity to arguments, relationship problems usually all have two things in common: dishonesty and selfishness. According to The Institute For Family Studies, the leading causes of divorce are: infidelity, incompatibility, drinking or drug use, growing apart, a
What Breaks Relationships And How To Fix Them Read More »
Think about Santa. He works all day every day without pay to get ready for one exciting night when he works harder than he has ever worked before in order to bring happiness. Think about Jesus. He worked every day of His mortal ministry; teaching, leading, healing, walking, serving others, and travailing to prepare Him
The Dignity of Work & The Will to Choose It Read More »
In 2012, a woman attending one of my Teaching Self-Government parenting trainings began to cry in the middle of my presentation about different styles of parenting. She timidly raised her hand and I called upon her to speak. Through sobs and tears she said, “My mom was that modern progressive, permissive type of parent you
Reclaiming The Right To Parent Our Own Children Read More »
When I was a little girl, my brothers used to tease me. Every time I was teased or called names by them, I allowed myself to become emotional. One day when I was upset, my father said to me, “Nicholeen, if you don’t let the teasing work, then it won’t be fun for them and
Where We Give Our Attention Matters Most Read More »
The political climate is pretty hot right now! Threats, scandals, verbal attacks, social unrest, corruption, and control tactics are all part of the current political scene. People are preparing for the worst no matter what the United States election turns out like. What preparations are the most effective? Preparing your own heart to be calm
Having Self-Government During Political Drama Read More »
“Is it too late for me and my child?” a single mother of a 17-year-old daughter asked me after telling me how her daughter won’t listen to her or talk to her, and is going against all the standards of her home. Just like so many other parents, this mother wanted to know if learning
How To Love a Disobedient or Wayward Child Read More »
What a difference our agency makes in who we choose to follow! When my daughter, Paije, was in a homeschool co-op class at age 14, after a discussion about what makes a good leader, the class was asked how they would know who to vote for when they were adults. My daughter shot up her
Parents, Pass-times, & Politics Read More »
My friend recently posted a picture of her family on a hike. The children were laughing and having a great time. I was instantly inspired to do a fun activity with my family. I thought, “Hiking is a great idea! We should plan a time to go on a family hike.” My friend was capturing
Pointing Fingers At Perfectionism Read More »
Have you ever completely lost control of yourself and you weren’t exactly sure why? This can happen to anyone. This usually means that you’ve been triggered in some way. There’s so much talk about emotional triggers nowadays that triggers are turning into common excuses for poor behavior. Could it be that we might sometimes be
Good Triggers vs. Bad Triggers and Calm Communication Skills Read More »
There are more sources for comedy than ever before with online video platforms, social media memes, and GIFS, yet people aren’t happier. In fact, depression and suicide statistics that are increasing all the time show us that people are sadder and more hopeless than previous generations. No program, hotline number, or amount of money or
If You Love Me, Smile! Read More »
If there was one lesson I craved to know as a child, it was how to know if something was right or true in a world of confusing voices. I remember sitting intently at church waiting for the magic teaching that would help me really learn how to know when I found truth, or when
What They Don’t Discern Can Hurt Them Read More »
One of the primary roles of parents is to be a leader of their children. Dedicated, motivated parents are usually one of two kinds of leaders; ambitious leaders or led leaders. While ambition seems like a powerful quality in a leader, it’s flawed because ambition is self-serving. On the other hand, a leader who is
The Truth About Ambitious Parents Read More »
Could it be that Coronavirus could actually cure your family? Now families have to be together all the time. Some families think this sounds awful. If a family is thinking this, then they are in need of lots of family time, not the contrary. In an effort to turn this pandemic into a blessing for
The Coronavirus Cure For Your Family Read More »
Trapped! That’s what many people feel like they are right now. Many children are complaining of being bored, or worse, having way too much screen time. Stress is infiltrating more homes globally by the day because businesses are closing their doors, people are losing their jobs, bills are still coming due, social distancing is making
How to Thrive When You’re Trapped Inside Read More »
Why do we cater to our stresses and forget to choose calmness? After all, calmness is the only state where we truly feel safe and empowered. Stress, anger, and frustration never lead to true empowerment or peace, only emotional bondage. In 1998, when I was the young mother of a small baby and a toddler,and
Choosing Calmness Amidst All the Stress Read More »
Creating quality, loving family relationships requires discerning between what actions are really quality and what actions are nothing more than conformity to social norms. Creating these quality relationships doesn’t require elaborate planning, just time. Strong family relationships are built upon many components, such as good communication, honesty, trust, love, forgiveness, bonding, listening, shared vision, and
Carving Out More Family Quality Time in a Fast-Paced World Read More »
Much emotional agony is avoided and more relationship healing is possible when a person learns to listen with love. There were two similar conversations that had very different results. The first conversation was between a mother and her son. The son told his mother about a problem he was having with a friend, but she
10 Lessons for Listening With Love Read More »
As I held my 15-year-old son’s hand and watched the magic of Christmas unfold around me with lights and nativity displays at the city center, I felt that date with my son was a parent’s dream come true. Who doesn’t dream of the perfect parent/child memory? We all want them, but could our desire for
How To Create Magical Family Memories Read More »
During this time of year when there are lists of things to do and places to go, don’t forget this one simple truth: people are more important than things. People are worth more of our focus than lists. We may think that the lists of things make the holiday perfect for the people, but that
Making Any Holiday the Perfect Holiday Read More »
Some might think that optimistic people are fake or somehow disconnected from reality, but I know for a fact that positivity is one of our choices no matter what circumstances are before us. Russell Nelsontaught that our “joy has little to do with the circumstances of our lives, but everything to do with the focus
A Vow to be Positive Read More »
Family traditions instill personal and family identity and bind families together throughout their many phases of growth and change. After children and grandchildren are grown and gone off to live their adult lives, the traditions remain as reminders of the sweetness of home and family, what is most important in life, and who they really
Family Traditions that Bind or Break or Unity for Christmas Read More »
“Do you see those sweet sisters over there? They inspire me. They couldn’t be more different, but they also couldn’t be more full of love toward each other than they are,” a friend of mine pointed out to me one day about two ladies who were her good friends. She went on to explain, “One
1 Easy Way to Wrap Your Holiday Gatherings In Love Read More »
One day my father told me something so profound that it literally changed my social life and my personal empowerment forever. After I finished telling him about how another child at school had been mean to me, he said, “Nicholeen, sticks and stones may break your bones, but words will never hurt you.” I’m guessing
“Choose Not to Be Harmed” Read More »
“But what if they just keep talking back and are driving me crazy,” a mother asked me while I was instructing a group of parents on how to teach their children to accept “no” answers. The mother of three told the group she knew she needed help becausesometimes she feels so crazy, or out of
Who Drives You Crazy? Read More »
Are we holding our children back?In the past 80-100 years, society has started holding children back with an artificial extension of childhood instead of empowering them forward toward purpose and adulthood. Thomas At age 12, Thomas Edison convinced his parents to allow him to leave home in order to sell newspapers to Grand Trunk Railroad
The Artificial Extension of Childhood Read More »
Children aren’t perfect, and neither are parents. However, parenting isn’t about being perfect. And, there’s no such thing as a perfect child. Of course, perfection isn’t the goal of my parenting anyway. My goal has always been to create joyful adults. Joyful adults are those that know what their mission in life is and they’re
Parenting with Grace Read More »
“I hate that I’ve been mean to my children before,” confessed a father I was speaking to recently. Instead of calmly handling difficult situations, this father had become frustrated a few times and lost his temper with his children. His voice tone and body were humble as he confessed this. He wasn’t making excuses for
Hope: Facing Toward Self-Government Read More »
Historically, as young people approached the age of 18, they would start to spread their wings and transition into adulthood by stepping outside of their comfort zones. Sadly, times have changed. Today, many teens are feeling increasingly more inadequate to attempt adult tasks. In fact, they often don’t even feel comfortable talking to adults. In
Teen-Culture and the Land of Make Believe Read More »
Freedom in the family is the key to raising children who are freer and more independent. The problem is, most people don’t understand freedom. Many families institute complete license without consequences assuming that’s freedom and that it will lead to independent children. But in reality, it leads to emotional bondage and relationship dysfunction. Personal freedom
Raising Independent Children Read More »
“Go long Porter!” said Dad to his 15-year-old son as they played Frisbee in the circle in front of our home. Dad and Porter throw Frisbees regularly in the evening. Am I mad that my husband is playing games with his son instead of helping me with the dinner preparation? No way! That play time
The Data About Dads and Child Self-Confidence Read More »
When I first decided to leave my high-paying career to stay home with my toddler son and daughter, I had to remind myself that I was picking the greater good. I was in the funeral industry and was really needed at an important time in people’s lives: the death of a loved one. I felt
From “Just a Mom” to Being Showcased on a BBC Program Read More »
Recently, while texting with my oldest son, he asked, “Hey, what do you want for Mother’s Day?” I shouldn’t really admit that I don’t like those kinds of questions, but the truth is I don’t. Maybe it’s because my love language isn’t gifts, or maybe it’s because I never know what to say. The most
What Your Mother Really Wants Read More »
In an ideal world, children would dutifully do their chores not only as effectively as Mom or Dad would do them, but also without delay. Unfortunately, we don’t live in an ideal world. Human brains, especially child brains, are wired to find more efficient ways to do tasks in order to save time or effort.
Parents are meant to shepherd their children toward truth and safety, as well as in learning skills, in order to prepare them for the purposes of their lives. But not all shepherds are the same. Two sisters were given some sheep to care for, and a promise that the sheep would be of great value
Shepherding the Children Read More »
The multiculturalism of modern society, or desire to promote all ideas or ways of living as good, no matter their opposition to moral, religious, social, and familial cultural norms, is creating negativity and confusion when it comes to attitudes about marriage and family. People have spent their young years reading books and watching movies that
Condolences Are Not Appropriate Read More »
Many parents of teen- or pre-teen-aged youth are confused about whether teenage rebellion is an attitude problem or whether the child is displaying healthy independence. When attitude problems seem like rebellion, parents wonder if rebellion is natural or simply a modern social construct that societies now think is developmentally normal. Rebellion is as old as
Healthy Independence vs. Rebellion Read More »
In his book, “The Power of Positive Thinking,” Norman Vincent Peale shares a story of a pastor talking to a painter about worrying. “Howard, don’t you ever worry?” the pastor asked the painter. The painter laughed and said, “No, not on your life. I don’t believe in it.” The painter goes on to tell how
Worry Not – Live Happy! Read More »
“Is it okay for children to correct their parents?” I often get asked by parents who are hoping to be just in their parenting. My answer to them is, “Well, that all depends how and when it’s done. There is a right way and a wrong way to correct children, and for children to correct
4 Rules to Remember for When They Try to Correct You Read More »
“If our society is coming apart at the seams, it is because the tailor and the seamstress in the home are not producing the kind of stitching that will hold under stress. In the name of giving advantages, we have too often bartered away the real opportunities of our children.” (1981, Be Thou an Example,
Stitching That Holds the Family Together Read More »
Even though the mistakes our children make are glaring us in the face, we also know that each of our children has certain attributes that make them wonderful, individual, and precious to us. Charitable parents focus more on those good, productive attributes than on the negative mistakes their children make daily. Each week I answer
Charitable Parenting Read More »
It’s all too common in many modern households to hear sighs, grumbling, complaining and whining from children when parents give reminders of daily work responsibilities, or when additional work assignments are given to children. But, before we think this is the way children have always felt about doing work or that everyone should feel work
How to Help Kids Enjoy Doing Work! Read More »
This Thanksgiving Day is dedicated to feeling and expressing gratitude for our blessings. Are you grateful for who you are and the roles you have? Two Mothers Two mothers, Tina and Katy, are watching the ball game of their oldest sons. Their boys play for the same team. Each mother has other children busily running
Grace is Behind the Thanks: Just Ask Mom Read More »
“Calmness is the rarest quality in human life. It is the poise of a great nature, in harmony with itself and its ideals. It is the moral atmosphere of a life self-centred, self-reliant, and self- controlled. Calmness is singleness of purpose, absolute confidence, and conscious power — ready to be focused in an instant to
2/3 of the Power Behind a Change of Heart Read More »
When today’s parents were children, the costume was all about sticking out individually. But today’s young people and families are leaning more and more toward theme costumes. Why is this? Well, modern youth and families are more about togetherness than their parent’s generation. Also, the youth seem to recognize the power of community and/or the
Strong Families Create a Halloween Sanctuary for Children Read More »
When the famed prime minister of England, William Pitt, was asked what made him a great prime minister, he didn’t say his hard work ethic, late night hours, or perseverance. He said, “Patience.” There are many attributes that are useful to parents as they’re raising their children during this often busy world full of attitude
Surviving Mom’s Worst Day Ever! Read More »
I’ve been writing about the best practices in raising children since 2006. During this time, I’ve covered a variety of subjects, but never did I think I would end up writing about a topic like this. No matter where you live or how you choose to educate your children, this database scandal could likely affect
Public Databases Destroying “Safe Places” For Children Read More »
“There is no more war in my classroom, and there is no more war in my home.” Those were the words of a teacher from Kenya this summer. It was part of a parenting training I attended designed to teach Catholic leaders how to teach their families self-government skills and good communication. In the 19
Fighting Over The Judgement Seat Read More »
Janae and Trisha both have a 12-year-old son who has a habit of being defiant. Each woman struggles with having the confidence to help her son change his behaviors during his outbursts. So why is Trisha’s son making so much more progress on staying calm and listening to her than Janae’s? Why is Trisha’s confidence
Love of Instructions and Reproof Read More »
Today’s children are caught in the middle of multiple moral battle zones. You could even say that children’s moral battles are divorcing them from their parents. One of the most common characteristics of a child with divorced parents is that the child feels pulled between the parents’ different values and lifestyles. It’s common for husbands
They’re Caught in the Moral Middle Read More »
I recently asked a group of 10-year-old children what kinds of negative consequences their families have. “At our house, we sweep the floor and clean,” said one boy. “Mom gets mad and goes into a bad mood,” said another boy. “Mom used to send us to time out, but we don’t do that anymore,” said
What Children Think of Negative Consequences Read More »
Family travel looks different these days than it used to. Today’s parents were raised in a slower time. Most families planned one or two trips a year, which were usually taken during school holidays, and in our case, in the family travel trailer. While there are still families that really don’t like to leave home
Traveling Trends Meet Parenting Problems Read More »
Sacrifice is vital for happiness. Most people think the word “sacrifice” is bad and sounds like a hardship, not a joyful journey. Happiness sounds much better! But without giving up some of our indulgences, excuses and time wasters, it’s difficult to accomplish the things that bring the most happiness, like fulfilling our roles as parents
What Will You Sacrifice? Read More »
As I rounded the corner of a shopping isle at a local grocery store, I heard crying. Through tears a young girl, about 8 years old, said, “Tell me what it is Mom. Tell me what this is.” The moment I turned into this isle, the mother was in the middle of yelling, “Shut up
Treasure the Little Ones Read More »
It’s often said that “a mother’s work is never done.” There are multiple ways to see this sentiment. Either Mother never does her work, or Mother always has a task that needs doing, or perhaps that Mother is a mother no matter the age of her children. The first interpretation gives a negative and lazy
What a Mother Wants Most! Read More »
“I like Dad better than Mom,” I said to my younger brother one sunny afternoon while sitting on the back of our rusty old Suburban. The moment I said that I knew that just a few weeks prior I was telling him that I liked Mom better than Dad. I knew I had changed my
The Battle Hymn of a Just Parent Read More »
No matter the amount of technology that’s developed to filter devices in order to keep children from viewing objectionable material, the mental, physical and spiritual risks of digital devices facing children have never been greater. Note: In this article I’m using the word “phone” liberally to mean all digital devices that are in regular use
How Many Times Do We Have to Talk About the Phone? Read More »
I participated in a recent demonstration at the United Nations to oppose the sexualization of children by UN agencies. These agencies are supposed to protect children. Right in the middle of my speech, a woman opposed to my views stuck a piece of paper in front of my face. The contentious act by this woman,
3 Ways to Foster Unity in a Contentious World Read More »
“You never can tell with bees,” said A.A. Milne’s cherished character Winne-the-Pooh. This was Pooh Bear’s naive way of saying he didn’t understand why bees did the things they did. He made his best guesses, but he always seemed to guess wrong and find himself in a prickled gorse bush — instead of feasting on
Trade Time for Anger: Find Calmness and Patience Read More »
Despite the fact that my parents worked very hard to provide for their growing family, some experiences were memorable in an uncomfortable way. I’ll never forget driving through Death Valley during the summer. It was 105 degrees in the middle of the night. We did our best to keep us all from roasting to death
6 Tips for Making the Most of Your Car Time Together Read More »
A friend of mine asked me what she could do for her teenage exchange student. This student was in the middle of a multiple, day-long teenage tantrum. The mother had told her exchange student that she couldn’t attend a sleepover because the family doesn’t do sleepovers. The teenage exchange student, in turn, became very emotional
Stopping Conflicts Before They Start Read More »
Over the years I’ve had a love/hate relationship with Disney. To be completely honest, recently I’ve been leaning more toward the hate side. That was until I saw the Disney movie “Cars 3.” On the surface, this movie looks like a typical Disney movie where the hero has to overcome a large obstacle to be
Grandparent Power for a Better Society Read More »
Christmas is full of symbols and characters that inspire us and that we can relate to. We all want to be Santa for someone each year, so we look for needs that we can meet anonymously — just like he would. Some of us relate to Rudolph. We feel different, but know that our difference
Who Are You This Christmas?! Read More »
