By: Nicholeen Peck & Heidi Schultz (of www.franticallysimple.com )
Dont’ let this title fool you. Heidi found out principles which work for all size families! She just happens to only have one child.
Raising An Only Child: Successful Parenting Principles Which Work! Read More »
Top 10 Videos of Frequently Asked Questions
Friends,
I get asked parenting questions all the time. Frequently, I get the same questions over and over again. So, I have taken the time to makevideo answersto thetop 10parentingquestionsI get asked. Take a few moments to take a look andshare them with your friends.
Top 10 Parenting Questions People Ask Read More »
“One question my husband had was that when you have a consequence it is quite often an extra chore. His thought is that this would make the children hate doing chores, that they would never want to do a chore unless forced to because they were the means for discipline. Have you found this to
Structured Family: Work as a Consequence Read More »
How often do you pick up the slack for your children? Do you ask them to do a task and then later fix it or finish it for them? What do you do when you realize the task wasn’t done? Most parents just do it themselves with the attitude that if they want something done right, they have to do it themselves.
Parenting Help: Don’t Do It For Them Read More »
…yes but how do you get them to work? My oldest (5yrs) always has to get get a drink or suddenly is tired or has a tummy ache when ever she hears the word “work” or “clean up.” It’s too “boring” she says. I am not about to make work “fun” for her because it
How Do You Get Them To Work? Read More »
I am pretty sure that just putting the word sex in the title of a blog post will make my blog not show up on a lot of your computers. If so, that is good. That means you have a good filter and are trying to keep the children protected from the conspirators in our world who want to enslave us all by destroying all the virtuous thoughts we normally have regarding the opposite gender and the act of marriage.
Recently I was asked:
Dear Nicholeen,
I am so impressed by the beautiful work you do as a mother and as an incredible example to families all over the world. Thank you for the work you do! I know you’re probably crazy busy, but I would really love to learn more about how you present sex education to your children. I just read a crazy disturbing article about what’s being taught in schools, and I want to be sure our children are taught about abstinence and the spiritual significance of the sex ordinance within marriage and the sacred nature of heterosexuality and well as the scientific aspects. It’s wild what teachers think is appropriate to teach Kindergartners and I’m doing research to make sure we’re hitting the right mark. If you could share your thoughts or send me to a link where you may have already addressed this, that would be awesome. Thanks to you and your sweet family!
You ask a great question. The topic of sexuality is a must for parents living in these times. My views are
Straight Talk About Sex: Children And Sex Read More »
So many people ask me how to control their out of control children… A man I really admire named Jeffrey Holland said, “…the only real control in life is self control.” I couldn’t agree more. You can control the settings on your computer, and control the television choices that come into your home. You can control all the things on your Family Standard and you can control what your family eats for dinner, but you can’t control another person. No matter how hard you try and how much power you try to look like you have, the only person you can control is yourself. Since that is the case, we should capitalize on that power we have to control ourselves, or govern ourselves. If we
Real Control! -Help For Parents Read More »
My two youngest children are best friends, and play a lot with each other. It is so fun to see them enjoy each other. This summer we have noticed that they are getting a bit too much play lately though. The sun comes up and someone is at our door asking to play. The children do their chores and run outside. They would stay there day after day, all day, if I didn’t ever call them in.
The other day my husband and I noticed some very distracted behaviors. My six year old was showing off a lot and acting a lot more “crazy” than usual. He was also trying to be the “funny guy” by popping off. We looked at each other and both knew something needed to change
Too Much Play Time?-Solving the Boredom Problem Read More »
“I came across your ideas on the LDSEHE website, and have been so inspired by all of it. I’m starting to read your book, hoping to fill in a few holes. I really like your idea for Friday family movie nights as your one source of TV. How do you make selections for that night? Do you have a list of movies you would recommend?”
You are right. We have a family TV watching policy to help our family not get bound by television. Our policy is that we don’t watch TV unless it is a movie on Friday family movie night.
Family TV Watching: Parenting Tip Read More »
My children have started a fun new game this Summer thanks to a very creative friend. They play camping. Their friend found lots of old odds and ends around the house and garage and loaded them into his wagon and brought them over to play. The children loved it so much, they play it every
Summer Fun for the Children; and the Parents Too! Read More »
“I do struggle and maybe you could give me some advice. I spend quite a bit of time with my kids in the morning going over little activities like school workbooks and story time and exercising together. Yet the minute I get on the phone or sit down to nurse the baby, the three boys are arguing or fighting or taking toys from each other or something of the sort. I have tried to get them to color or do a certain activity together, but that only lasts so long. It’s hard to discipline when you are nursing the baby.
I know I have a bit of post-pardom and always feel like I am always nursing the baby or disciplining my children. I have felt discouraged with my 3 boys behavior and realize some of their actions comes from mom spending so much time with the new little one. Do you have any tips or suggestions for me on how to best help teach my boys and solve the problems.”
J You hit a common discipline problem right on the head. I would like to meet a mother who can have a 30 minute phone conversation and not have things fall apart a little bit. My one hopeful thought to you is that as they grow, they learn to live without you for 30 minutes, or more. 😉
Nursing a baby is also a hard one. I have been there too.
“Mom is on the phone” ~Discipline Problem Read More »
One of my passions is astronomy. When I go out in my backyard and look through my telescope at my friends, the planets and stars, I feel so close to God. Not because heaven is in space, but because it is so obvious there is organization in all things. He is a God of order; with everything in it’s perfect place. Everything has a purpose; a mission. Since He is order in all we see it only makes sense that people should live by order too.
Just like laws and principles govern the skies and the earth, there are laws meant to govern us as well. That is why we have chosen to apply governing rules to our home too. We feel like there is no better example of how to run a home than the way God runs our world; the current home for His family.
Our family has a set structure. We have certain meetings each week to strengthen the family relationships and keep the home in order. The meetings we have are
I found Character, by Samuel Smiles in ebook format for free. So cool! Here’s the link if you want to pass it along: http://www.gutenberg.org/files/2541/2541-h/2541-h.htm#2HCH0011
Character Book: Must Read Read More »
“I have a 5 year old son that is in kindergarten. He loves school because of all his friends there… Unfortunately with school I see him still coming home with some bad habits that we must work to break. I think his teacher is great but with all the kids in the class she can’t be expected to enforce/reward self-government principles. My concern is that he is getting confused with discipline at home and less discipline at school. How do you address this issue with your kids?”
It is hard to have a child come home from school with behaviors you need to break all the time.
School Problems ~When The Classroom Comes Home Read More »
Question:
“The biggest struggle we have with my son is that he wants to be the parent – he wants to be in control, not necessarily of my husband and I, but of the rest of the kids (he’s #2 of 5). For instance, this morning he made himself a “dessert sandwich” (he just made this up, bread with butter and cinnamon on it) before breakfast, but got mad and yelled at our 2 year old for getting into the fridge to get an apple while he still had the sandwich in his hand. Even me standing there saying “It’s okay, she can have the apple” didn’t calm things right away. ALL THE TIME he gets after his siblings for things he sees as wrong, but he himself can do no wrong, even if he’s doing the same things they are.”
About Parents
I love how at the beginning of this question you say that your son thinks he’s the parent and then at the end you say that he can do no wrong even though he is doing the same thing. These two statements together in the same paragraph make me smile because that is just what most parents really do. They get after the children for doing what they, the parents, are doing all the time too. These parents for some reason feel like if they don’t have to look at their short comings in their children then the short comings aren’t really there and don’t need to be addressed.
I will never forget
Parenting Questions: What to do when they think they are the parent Read More »
On the first CD of my Teaching Self Government Audio Seminar I speak about teaching your family about having a mission as a family group. The mission is what you will do to reach your family’s vision for the future. An important part of teaching your children about working toward a vision and living for a mission is teaching them about philanthropy, or service. Service is also an integral part of building strong character. We all know giving our children service opportunities helps them become more selfless, which aids in family unity. However, serving as a family also gives your children practice in living a mission for a vision. This practice will help them find success in projects their entire lives. As a family, we are always looking for a way to serve others. In fact,
Families Working Together ~Mission Oriented Families Read More »
Nicholeen,
I’ve got “bubblegum pink” paint all over the carpet (and some furniture) right now that should NOT be there, and I have yelled and got angry at 3 of the 9 kids one who is under 24 hr priviledge loss but didn’t have anything to do with it, and I came in to my computer to take a breather and look what I found in my inbox! I was already feeling bad, and your article is the big dose of truth I need, but how do you turn it around when you’ve really blown it? Do I just bounce in with my new perspective, apologize and ask for forgiveness? Did this happen to you in the beginning? Thanks and God bless with your health issues.
OH………………..That is frustrating for sure. I feel your pain, and your frustration. I have to say, I have never had that one happen before. But, I have had my share of paint spills, gum on the carpet, bubble spills, and marker on the walls. Some children are just naturally more curious than others aren’t they? My children have never been too curious, but they have had friends over the years who have been and have started creative play in motion.
To answer you question,
Changing Perspective…You Can Do It. Read More »
One of Those Days
Have you ever had one of those days where you go, go, go? On these days there are lots of places to get to, you are always running late and your children seem to be grumpy, whiny, and aggressive. You don’t know if you’ll ever master getting out the door with a smile on your face and everyone in a good mood.
At the ends of days like these we plop on the couch grateful that there is finally quiet in the house and still some chocolate ice cream in the freezer. We hope the children will give us at least two hours of good sleep and that we might be able to actually check something off or our to-do list before we get to ‘turn in.’ These are the days we can’t wait to finish.
I have felt those days too.
Parenting Discipline ~Another Perspective Read More »
…We just started this approach to parenting a few weeks ago, and while the first couple of weeks went well because the kids all loved the praise and even the novelty of picking jobs out of a jar, we’ve hit this bump where most are dawdling, and adding another chore that just doesn’t get done doesn’t seem effective so we’ve started losing privileges for unfinished work. Granted, they are ages 8 and under, and perhaps I need to keep teaching the jobs rather than assume they know since I taught them once or twice. Thanks so much for sharing, both of you! I’m learning so much!
Keep up the good work! You went through your honeymoon stage and now you have hit the part where the children are hoping you will lose your consistency. They are testing to see if you are really going to stick to your new family government system. Keep talking about your vision and Stay consistent.
I have found that dawdling only continues to be a problem if the parents
Changing Parenting Styles ~The Honeymoon Read More »
“I was wondering….what do you do about name calling, or when children say bad words? My children say crap, stupid, dumb, etc… No matter how many times I tell them to stop, they don’t. So would you have them do a chore everytime they named called, or said a bad word? or Would you do something different?”
Name calling is obviously not appropriate because it destroys the feeling in the home and encourages contention and selfishness. There are a couple of ways I handle this sort of thing.
Stopping the Name Calling, and Crass Words Read More »