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Social Skills
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Worry Not – Live Happy!
In his book, “The Power of Positive Thinking,” Norman Vincent Peale shares a story of a pastor talking to a painter about worrying.“Howard, don’t you ever worry?” the pastor asked the painter.The painter laughed and said, “No, not on your life. I don’t believe in it.”The painter goes on to tell how he didn’t have time to worry and how he set aside one day a week to worry, pushing off all his daily concerns until that one day. But, after trying to worry on the designated day for all the things he’d pushed out of his mind throughout the week he couldn’t do it. He was a failure at worrying. The painter had already essentially trained himself not to worry.Whether knowingly or unknowingly, this painter had worked out a method, or skill set, for overcoming worry.Mr. Peale explained that, “people fail to overcome such troubles as worry because…they allow …
Posted by Monica Pond on February 21, 2019
What Will You Sacrifice?
Sacrifice is vital for happiness. Most people think the word “sacrifice” is bad and sounds like a hardship, not a joyful journey. Happiness sounds much better! But without giving up some of our indulgences, excuses and time wasters, it’s difficult to accomplish the things that bring the most happiness, like fulfilling our roles as parents and living the missions God has in store for us. What’s your mission? Do you feel called to, “Feed the hungry, clothe the naked, heal the sick, teach the ignorant, comfort the lonely, create beauty, liberate the captives, or preach the gospel”? (Oliver DeMille) These eight missions appear repeatedly throughout history as ways people change the world and others’ lives for good. Does one of these missions stand out to you? Did you know that being a parent covers all eight of these missions? What will we sacrifice to do our very best at our …
Posted by Monica Pond on June 6, 2018
What If Your Child Is A Bully?
Let’s be careful not to bully our children into not being bullies. In a recent Huffington Post article a mother talked about how she taught her daughter”to damn well treat people right.” (Sorry for the language. That washer exact quote.) In the article the motherthreatened her daughter with no ride to school if the daughter didn’t include another girl in her friend group. In the end, the girls became friends and the daughter learned: “…her initial instinct about people isn’t always correctly motivated.” And that “…you can be friends with the least likely people; the best friendships aren’t people that are your ‘type!’In the world of friendship, contrast is a plus…” While I understand the point of the article is to promote inclusion of others, I have to “disagree appropriately” on a few things. First, teaching children not to follow their instincts can be dangerous for them. Instincts stop many …
Posted by Nicholeen Peck on April 25, 2016
Truth Be Told…Influence of Family is Astounding!
Even though there’s violence dotting the globe, the largest battle of our day isn’t physical. It’s a war of words. All these words are supposed to lead the listeners to truth. Often the talk feels cheap even though the claim is each new idea, paradigm and argument is the most valuable. Is this word war new? How are children faring during this ideological war? What is happening to family relationships and the historical pattern for finding happiness and success in life? How is this war impacting business, government and religious groups? What impact does the family have on this battle? This battle of ideas has been going on since the beginning of time and is often referred to as “the great debate.” Philosophers, scientists, theologians and families have tried to determine which ideas are true and which are merely creative, or worse, controlling. Why? Because the search for truth is …
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Posted by Monica Pond on February 22, 2017
Treasure the Little Ones
As I rounded the corner of a shopping isle at a local grocery store, I heard crying. Through tears a young girl, about 8 years old, said, “Tell me what it is Mom. Tell me what this is.” The moment I turned into this isle, the mother was in the middle of yelling, “Shut up right now or you’ll be sorry!!!” The mother caught a quick glimpse of me and immediately pretended she was examining the paper towels on the shelf. Then she quickly walked away. She had four girls with her. The oldest looked about 13. The 13-year-old, who didn’t see me, grabbed her younger sister by the arm and whacked her on the back side as hard as she could. The older sister looked proud of herself — even though she now knew I was watching. Then the two of them quietly followed the group to the next …
Posted by Monica Pond on May 23, 2018
Traveling Trends Meet Parenting Problems
Family travel looks different these days than it used to. Today’s parents were raised in a slower time. Most families planned one or two trips a year, which were usually taken during school holidays, and in our case, in the family travel trailer. While there are still families that really don’t like to leave home for even one night (even though I don’t know any of them myself), the average household spends 2 percent of its annual income on travel expenses. A family’s average cost of travel is $4,700 per year according to Value Penguin and $4,300 per vacation according to Stuffed Suitcase. Many families spend around 30 days on vacation annually. What impact do all those travel days have on family relationships? I think the hope is that they be positive. Parents have always known that to create lasting memories, families need to have shared experiences for extended periods …
Posted by Monica Pond on June 18, 2018
Trade Time for Anger: Find Calmness and Patience
“You never can tell with bees,” said A.A. Milne’s cherished character Winne-the-Pooh. This was Pooh Bear’s naive way of saying he didn’t understand why bees did the things they did. He made his best guesses, but he always seemed to guess wrong and find himself in a prickled gorse bush — instead of feasting on fresh honey. As a beekeeper, I understand what part of getting honey Pooh never bothered to do: observe the actions of the bees and himself around the bees. When someone approaches the hive, a few guard bees automatically tip forward on their front legs, extending their stingers in the air. If the person coming toward the hive doesn’t retreat, then the bees start to fly at the person and push their stingers into the intruder. When bees sting, they die. Sir Francis Bacon said, “Men must not turn [into] bees.” When a person puts his …
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Posted by Monica Pond on March 1, 2018
To Find Personal Success, Give Yourself a “No” Answer
Self-government is being able to determine the cause and effect of any given situation and possessing a knowledge of your own behaviors so that you can control them. This means that each person decides what type of person they ought to be and plans for how to become this person. When, as it always does, the person falls off the path to success a bit, the person recognizes what has happened and then corrects his course to maintain his desired direction. This is what it means to master yourself. June decided that she wanted to improve her health and maybe shed a few pounds. She determined that to accomplish her goal she needed to exercise more. So, she planned to walk before work each morning for 45 minutes. At first June did great. She awoke one hour earlier and walked daily for about 10 days. She felt better than ever …
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Posted by Monica Pond on August 9, 2017
They’re Caught in the Moral Middle
Today’s children are caught in the middle of multiple moral battle zones. You could even say that children’s moral battles are divorcing them from their parents. One of the most common characteristics of a child with divorced parents is that the child feels pulled between the parents’ different values and lifestyles. It’s common for husbands and wives to get divorced because they start following different morals. The children are almost always caught in the middle of these two moral worlds and are left to decide which parent they want to follow. Unfortunately, children of divorce aren’t the only ones who feel caught in the middle of mixed moral messages. Even though most parents weren’t perfect youngsters, the majority still try to implement high moral standards at home and raise the moral bar higher than what they lived up to as youth. This is especially the case for parents who lived …
Posted by Monica Pond on August 1, 2018
The Illusion of Innocence Facing Today’s Children
In a world full of sexual depravity, diverse addictions, familial dysfunction, lascivious social platforms, manipulative media, and irate people of all ages, is it possible to even hope for our children to have an innocent upbringing? A routine trip through a store like Walmart, for example, can start a child’s brain processing in sexual and dysfunctional directions. What is a parent to do about this problem? How can a family live in the world but not become part of all the lewdness and cruelty so many people in society are laughing at? The Illusion of Innocence: Living in the World For many years I’ve taken my children, and often other children I teach, to the Utah Shakespeare Festival. Every time prior to attending, I call the festival and check to be sure the play is developmentally appropriate for children and will preserve their innocence. This year I asked the usual …
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Posted by Monica Pond on November 16, 2017
The Coronavirus Cure For Your Family
Could it be that Coronavirus could actually cure your family? Now families have to be together all the time. Some families think this sounds awful. If a family is thinking this, then they are in need of lots of family time, not the contrary.In an effort to turn this pandemic into a blessing for your family, I did a free webinar on March 21, 2020 to teach parents how to improve their family cultures. If you missed that event, here is a link to a part of that. This is a message all parents need to hear during this time.https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y5a2ENPFr_Y&t=7sHere is a link to the full webinar:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-NWoGd4qYO4&t=3sDon’t let your spirits get down during this crisis. Families really can thrive during this time if they focus their efforts on strengthening their family cultures, instead of focusing on what they can’t do.
Posted by Monica Pond on March 25, 2020
The Artificial Extension of Childhood
Are we holding our children back?In the past 80-100 years, society has started holding children back with an artificial extension of childhood instead of empowering them forward toward purpose and adulthood.Thomas At age 12, Thomas Edison convinced his parents to allow him to leave home in order to sell newspapers to Grand Trunk Railroad train line passengers. In no time he had started his own newspaper and opened a private laboratory in a railway baggage car. Edison was a 12-year-old entrepreneur. This was a steppingstone to the laboratories, inventions and businesses he would once be known for all over the world.Before you start thinking that Thomas Edison was an especially gifted child, you may want to know that he was kicked out of school at a young age because the teacher said he was not smart enough for school.So, how did this homeschooled world icon become the Edison we know …
Posted by Monica Pond on October 7, 2019