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“When your kids are fighting, do you try to instruct them in the middle of that?  I often try to intervene but maybe too often – they don’t seem to be learning to problem solve with each-other rather than tattling and trying to get Mom to settle things in their favor.  I honestly don’t know what would happen if I let my kids continue to fight until it blows over or comes to blows, I usually step in and separate them before I can see how they would solve the problem.  I know they are generally out of instructional control when they are fighting, so anything I tell them at that poi

In case some of you don’t look at the comments, I wanted to share this one. 

“I definitely relate to this mother’s feelings. It is really overwhelming to implement this new system and I make mistakes all the time. I’m also finding that I’m less diligent as time goes on and so it helps me to read all the advice here so I can “keep swimming” and not give up. I keep thinking of your words on the CD that it takes work to set this up and we have to be willing to do the hard work. I know it is worth it. It has already made a big difference, I just need to keep trying and improving.