We have a problem with people getting into things in the house without asking. For example chocolate chips, cookies in the freezer and so on. We also have a problem with dishonesty.
The consequence for these (decided by the family) Dishonesty: 30 min.
Getting Each Other in Trouble Read More »
Many people have expressed interest in my upcoming book: Parenting A House United: Changing Children’s Hearts and Behaviors by Teaching Self-Government.
I have started pre-selling copies of this book to raise money for the acutal printing at some of the latest speaking events.
The book has taken longer than expected, but is finished with editing now and only needs to be formatted and printed. Watch the site for a pre-sale. This will be the only way to get the book at a discounted price. It will be coming in a few days.
Nicholeen
Just so all of you know. My show is airing on BBC Three in Britain on November 5th. We won’t be able to see it in the U.S. but the BBC is sending a copy of the show in the mail to me the day it airs. I will find a way to share it with all of my friends.
That’s the latest. ~Nicholeen
Bedtime negative behaviors. my 5 year old just will not settle down. I get really frustrated with him. I don’t feel like I can do the rule of three or extra chores when he is supposed to be going to sleep, and if I tell him he has earned them for the morning, the consequence doesn’t seem real to him. My husband’s solution is to give him three warnings, and then spank him. I am beginning to hate bedtime.
Q: “With my 5 year old, when I am correcting negative behavior and I ask him to practice with me, he goes into goofy mode and doesn’t want to practice correct behavior, or does it silly. Should I give him consequences for this behavior? or should I skip the practice?”
Are you listening to me? Read More »
One afternoon my children and I went on a walk to our local library. The library is about one and a half miles from our home. After a great time reading and exploring together in the library, we started our mile and a half walk home.
During the walk one of my small children mentioned he was hungry. It was getting close to dinner time, and would still be a little while before we reached home. When we were about a half way home we passed a home which had a large apple tree growing on the property. The apples on the tree were perfectly ripe and large. My son immediately notice
Stand For Something Read More »
While making bread one day I heard confusion coming from downstairs. After asking the children what was happening I found out that one of our darling little friends, who was over playing, broke a toy and was really worried about getting into trouble. Apparently, the little five year old girl was playing with a toy when it dropped and broke. The other children assured her that it would be alright, but she was still worried.
Our sweet friend became so anxious that she hid herself in the bathroom for a while, and when she was found there came out and found another more private pl
Recently I have had multiple people email with questions about their husbands. It seems that some fathers are reluctant to make changes in their family culture and systems even when the rest of the family is already using the teaching-self-government system. Even though I am speaking from a woman’s perspective today to women primarily, I have also had fathers email about their wives not wanting to change, so the topic is valid for both mothers and fathers.
Why is it that one parent can be ready for change and another isn’t? The answer to this question is probably individual in many
Fathers figuring things out Read More »
“Waaaaahaaaaa!” screamed Porter, my five year old, from the other side of the family room. I looked over there just is time to see Paije, his much older sister, trying to pry one of her shoes from her little brother’s hands while keeping a close eye on the other shoe. Before I could even get a word in, Paije had grabbed the first shoe away from her younger brother and no
Teaching How to Stop Teasing Read More »
My daughter had one of her best friends over to play. After playing for about 45 minutes, the friend came from the basement in tears to her mother. She was really upset because she was having a hard time communicating with my daughter.
Choose Communication Not Sides Read More »
Can one person change the world just by being herself? I think so. That is where the power in all of us lies; in the person we were meant to become. If we find this person, we will then find our power to change the world.
Live each day like it matters. Because it does. One action based on one thought is where the power to change the world lies. Touch people. Touch your children. Influence. That is why we are all here.
The Power to Change Read More »
Parenting is the grand mission. It is all eight missions talked about in Dr. DeMille’s lecture. Whenever I speak about missions in my seminars, people always want more about the eight missions, so I thought it would be exciting for many of my readers to know about the free download. Enjoy!
Free Download -The Eight Missions Read More »
Another way I change my children’s hearts is to see what changes I have to make in myself. If a relationship is suffering, it is usually a two person problem. So, if I feel disconnected from my child, I take a good hard look at what I can do to change myself, motivate myself, and inspire myself. In short, I try to see how I can live better so that I can inspire my child to live better. In the past this has even required a new way of communicating to my family. So far, this approach to changing hearts has been a big blessing for myself and my family.
If I am going to in
Teaching Self Government requires Self Government Read More »
Hi, Nicholeen,I have a quick question for you. I’m struggling with what to do for discipline/consequences when we’re away from home. (Specifically in the car or in a store.) My kids tend to pick at each other, fight, kick, etc., in the car and to run away from me or do other annoying things (push the cart the wrong direction, touch things they shouldn’t, etc.) at the store. The younger ones especially (age 2-4ish) don’t really care enough about what’s coming in the future for them to care if I give them a consequence that will be carried outParenting On the Go ~Car and Store Struggles Read More »
I recently received a very inspiring email which answers the question “How will Teaching Self Government change my family?” I love to see what Teaching Self Government looks like in other homes, so I thought you would enjoy it too.
TSG has change my life. It has opened my eyes to the 4 basic communication skills. It has given me hope that despite my upbringing, I can learn the skills to help me be a better parent and communicator with my children. It helps me to pause when I’m really frustrated, to know what to say in any situation instead of constantly having to be creative
It Changed My Life Read More »
Thank you all so much for your wonderful advice and suggestions for my book title! It is really valuable to get your opinions. After reviewing a great poll and reading through many comments which weren’t on the poll, I have decided the title of the book will be:
A House United
I’ve read about Love and Logic, Power of Positive Parenting and other books that were ok, but not memorable. You know how I feel about L and L, too confusing, too inconsistent, creates too many power struggles. P of PP I loved and recomend to help you get in a good frame of mind, but I didn’t walk away from that empowered with the tools/skills to follow through with my new vision of the P of PP. I’m all pumped up to parent with positiveness, but what does that look like, how does is sound, how does it really play out in the heat of the moment when my first reaction is to
Buy the Book for Cheap! Read More »
I still continue to work through as many of the questions which have been sent to me as possible, and feel bad that I don’t have time to get to them as quickly as I would like to. Recently, I have done lots of mentor calls with people to answer some people’s questions more quickly. Others have felt it helpful to have mentor calls to start their family government off in the right direction.
If you are intersted in having a mentor call with me, I am able to schedule one hour calls for $50 per hour at this time. You will also get a recording of your call so that you can refer back whenever you like.
Mentoring Opportunity Read More »
Teaching Self Government
Full Day Seminar
9:00 – 5:00
In Cedar City, Utah
August 22, 2009
Contact: [email protected] for cost and location information.
Cedar City on August 22 Read More »
Problem solving is a great group skill as well as an individual skill. Group discussions and family meetings are great places to use SODAS. My children are not perfect, and never will be, so we get the opportunity to problem solve together all the time. One day, a few years ago, all four of my children ended up crying all at
Problem Solving in groups Read More »