Pennie Rumsey

Before I found Teaching Self-Government, building relationships used to be a mystery to me. I remember about 5 years ago I began to learn that building relationships was a good thing to focus on. I used to think that building relationships happened through eating ice-cream together, watching movies, or by doing fun things together that we all enjoyed. Certainly relationships can be built that way, but I didn’t know any other way.

Your children are amazing, aren’t they? I love the book called “The 4th Turning” to help remind us that we are raising a generation of heroes. For most of us that means that we are doing something differently than when we were raised. It means taking all the good that we were given and making

Are the holidays stressing you out? How can using TeachingSelf-Government skills help you?

The holiday season is a verybusy timewith lots of people to think about,lots of get togethers, and yet we still need to live our regular lives. It is very easy to get stressed out and feel like you’re running out of time. We wanted to help you take a minute to refocus on what matters most.

In this week’s Audio Gem you will learn:

• How to hold the individual moments precious
• How to slow down and connect in relationships
• Why it is important to look in our children’s eyes
• Happiness comes from the connection in the relationship
• The telescope principle
• Not allowing the details to take over your emotions

It only takes a moment to build or destroy a relationship. Takethe time to look in their eyes so that you build lastingrelationships with your children this Christmas season.

To the victory of your family,
Pennie Rumsey

As we work toward greater peace in our home, periods of chaos will happen. That doesn’t mean we have to choose to make it worse by adding our negative emotion to what is already causing the problem. Instead, work on being calm and teach your children by example how to communicate deliberately through group problem solving. Being calm is real power.

This week’s Gem is on improving your tone. It answers the question “How do you trust and help to change their hearts?”

“In your homes all you have to do is set up the system and trust that it will work. If you have that kind of trust you don’t need to try to force. Because remember the opposite of trust if force. Speed is not nearly important as the impact.” Nicholeen

This is a Gem from a conversation between Nicholeen and millionaire Jerry Norton. Jerry Norton said “Having money does not make you greedy or bad. It makes you more of what you already are. So if you’re a giving sharing person, it will make you more giving and sharing. If you’re greedy it will make you more greedy. Money just makes you more of what you already are.”

Read Nicholeen’s exclusive article for TSG Gems on creating stable moral government in your home. She says, “There are many things that are attacking the morals in our families these days. In fact, along with distraction, the attack on family values and morals is the biggest problem our society is facing right now. Society is becoming more and more vulnerable to these attacks because the families are not fortifying themselves against the attacks.

If families have solid beliefs/morals and create family cultures where those morals and beliefs are nurtured, then the family cannot be manipulated by the latest social trends. The family standard is a document that helps morally direct the family’s decisions. This document is drafted by mom and dad with the help of God’s natural laws so that it consists of actual morals and principles that will protect and free the family.”

Do you have a hard time recognizing a power struggle?
This week’s Video Gem is on recognizing power struggles so we can stop them without getting sucked into them. I heard a description a while ago that a power struggle is like a tornado and it wants to suck you in and leave behind destruction in it’s path.
In this video we see Jackie (Mom) answering questions about Jackie’s (daughter) concerns. Then after Nicholeen helps her to see the power struggle, she begins to discuss and address the behavior that is causing the problem. We need to stop the power struggles before. like a tornado, they destroy your family relationships .

Don’t you just wish you could do the most effective things as a parent and avoid bad behavior all together?

I love this class because it focuses on the idea that “Good = Good”. Nicholeen talks about how we need to correct bad behavior to teach our children through cause and effect to show them bad = bad. It is easier to look at the bad. It is harder to focus on the good. I think of praise as the work we do to swim upstream in the river of life, while the reactive things we do floats us down the river of life in the path of least resistance.

This Gem features Nicholeen reading and discussing a delightful book called “Hip, Hip, Hooray for Annie McRae” by Brad Wilcox. As one of the 8 Tips of Effective praise, Nicholeen talks about praising and really listening.

My favorite quote from this Gem is this:

“We need to start by forming a vision of what we want our characters to be, and our children need to have the opportunity to form that vision about themselves as well. And then they need to learn how to act. This is done by modeling. If we have a vision of what our character is going to be [then they will have a vision of what they want their characters to be.]”

This is my favorite quote from Nicholeen on this Gem:

“What we’re talking about today is freedom for yourselves: freedom for your body, freedom for your mind, and freedom for your heart. Those are the 3 parts of a soul. They are meant to work together, not against each other. When a person learns to put all together working in harmony, that person has extreme happiness. Self-government is power.”