Toddlers (0-4)

How To Love a Disobedient or Wayward Child

“Is it too late for me and my child?” a single mother of a 17-year-old daughter asked me after telling me how her daughter won’t listen to her or talk to her, and is going against all the standards of her home. Just like so many other parents, this mother wanted to know if learning …

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Support Call 9-23-20

Whole Call: https://s3.amazonaws.com/1-SupportCalls/2020/09September/TSG_SC_9-23-20_WholeEdited.mp3   Question: I love all that I am learning and becoming with Teaching Self Government, especially that giving up control and honoring agency doesn’t have to lead to chaos… But sometimes it does. 🙂 We held the paper airplanes simulation in our family, and when we debriefed it, our kids were all …

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Support Call 9-17-20

Whole Call: https://s3.amazonaws.com/1-SupportCalls/2020/09September/TSG_SC_9-16-20_WholeEdited.mp3 Question: Hi Nicholeen, I homeschool 5 children and have a 2 year old toddler. I am introvert with a load of high energy spirited children and one ADHD child. All the talking that’s involved in homeschooling and then all the talking involved in the TSG is hard on me. I hate having …

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Good Triggers vs. Bad Triggers and Calm Communication Skills

Have you ever completely lost control of yourself and you weren’t exactly sure why? This can happen to anyone. This usually means that you’ve been triggered in some way. There’s so much talk about emotional triggers nowadays that triggers are turning into common excuses for poor behavior. Could it be that we might sometimes be …

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Support Call 8-12-20

Whole Call: https://s3.amazonaws.com/1-SupportCalls/2020/08August/TSG_SC_8-12-20_WholeEdited.mp3   Question:   Hi Nicholeen, A bit about us: We are a homeschooling family of 7 from Australia: Dad, mum, 10yr old girl, 3 boys aged 8,6 and 4 and a brand new baby girl! She is just 12 days old! I bought your course two days before I gave birth and …

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Giving Your Family A Reason to Care About Family

Shut down doesn’t have to feel like shut down! Due to current restrictions caused by COVID-19, many families aren’t traveling as much as they normally do this time of year. Even local activities in many areas are still difficult to enjoy because of closures. But, that doesn’t mean we should stop having fun as a …

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Talking About Nothing: Is It Healthy?

Our family loves games! We play card games, board games, outdoor games, sports, and imagination games. Sometimes we have conversations about games we play, but most of the time we talk about things of more substance such as family, improving relationships, truths we’ve found, books we’ve read, experiences we’ve had, memories we share, family history, …

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Simple Solutions for Lack of Motivation Problems

A mother recently asked me how to help her daughter feel motivated to do anything besides sit around the house. She isn’t alone. With the new quarantine lifestyle, many families are thriving with the increase of family time, personal time, and relationship-building. But, even the most involved parents can still find that their child might …

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Choosing Calmness Amidst All the Stress

Why do we cater to our stresses and forget to choose calmness? After all, calmness is the only state where we truly feel safe and empowered. Stress, anger, and frustration never lead to true empowerment or peace, only emotional bondage. In 1998, when I was the young mother of a small baby and a toddler,and …

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Carving Out More Family Quality Time in a Fast-Paced World

Creating quality, loving family relationships requires discerning between what actions are really quality and what actions are nothing more than conformity to social norms. Creating these quality relationships doesn’t require elaborate planning, just time. Strong family relationships are built upon many components, such as good communication, honesty, trust, love, forgiveness, bonding, listening, shared vision, and …

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10 Lessons for Listening With Love

Much emotional agony is avoided and more relationship healing is possible when a person learns to listen with love. There were two similar conversations that had very different results. The first conversation was between a mother and her son. The son told his mother about a problem he was having with a friend, but she …

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How To Create Magical Family Memories

As I held my 15-year-old son’s hand and watched the magic of Christmas unfold around me with lights and nativity displays at the city center, I felt that date with my son was a parent’s dream come true. Who doesn’t dream of the perfect parent/child memory? We all want them, but could our desire for …

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Making Any Holiday the Perfect Holiday

During this time of year when there are lists of things to do and places to go, don’t forget this one simple truth: people are more important than things. People are worth more of our focus than lists. We may think that the lists of things make the holiday perfect for the people, but that …

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“Choose Not to Be Harmed”

One day my father told me something so profound that it literally changed my social life and my personal empowerment forever. After I finished telling him about how another child at school had been mean to me, he said, “Nicholeen, sticks and stones may break your bones, but words will never hurt you.” I’m guessing …

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What Your Mother Really Wants

Recently, while texting with my oldest son, he asked, “Hey, what do you want for Mother’s Day?” I shouldn’t really admit that I don’t like those kinds of questions, but the truth is I don’t. Maybe it’s because my love language isn’t gifts, or maybe it’s because I never know what to say. The most …

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Stitching That Holds the Family Together

“If our society is coming apart at the seams, it is because the tailor and the seamstress in the home are not producing the kind of stitching that will hold under stress. In the name of giving advantages, we have too often bartered away the real opportunities of our children.” (1981, Be Thou an Example, …

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Ah, 3-Year-Olds!

I once heard from a mother who was struggling with her three-year-old. The girl didn’t take “No” answers well, even when they practiced. When she earned a consequence she either wouldn’tdothe chore or would holler if it was the removal of a privilege.If the mother gave her a “No” answer to anything, the girl would flop on the floor and scream. If she didn’t get what she wanted from her siblings, she would yell and hit them.She was a sweet girl, but she was also very strong-willed and determined to get her way.

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Charitable Parenting

Even though the mistakes our children make are glaring us in the face, we also know that each of our children has certain attributes that make them wonderful, individual, and precious to us. Charitable parents focus more on those good, productive attributes than on the negative mistakes their children make daily. Each week I answer …

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