Relationships

Gratitude Tip

In the post below I discussed teaching our children gratitude.  I forgot to mention one thing we do which teaches gratefulness the most; thank you notes. 

Thank you notes are almost a thing of the past.  This is sad and possibly selfish.  Nothing replaces the warmth and love the feeling of a hand written note or letter gives to a reader.  I have lovingly kept cards and notes from all of the dear people currently in my life and those who are no longer living.  Seeing the writing and words from my grandmother warms my soul.  I am so glad that she believed in writing cards and notes to me, so

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Christmas Character Building

Samuel Smiles said, “Worst of all are the grumblers and growlers at fortune–who find that whatever is, is wrong,” or not enough.

Quiet a few years ago, we had a Christmas day that changed all the Christmas days to come.  We had a nice large Christmas with lots of presents for the children.  The children opened their presents, and then the grandparents came over with gifts.  After opening a present from a grandparent, one of my children said, “Is that all?” 

I about died!  Not only was this a huge social no-no, but my child was behaving very selfishly and that was unacceptable.  This kin

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Christmas Captivity

Today I was reading my scriptures and came across the word captive.  I pondered on this word for some time. 

Captivecomes from the Latin word “Captivus”, which means to seize or to take. 

Not surprisingly, captivatealso comes from the Latin word “Captivus”, with the same meaning. 

My thoughts turned to Christmas and family.  There are so many things at Christmas time that captivate our thoughts, and families.  We have concerts, parties, festivals, gift and holiday preparation.  All of these things, just like television and popular media choices can of

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Christmas Sweater

I recently read a book called the Christmas Sweater.  In this book, the main character (a teenager) makes a lot of mistakes.  Glenn Beck, the author, tells what the teenager was thinking and how he really wanted to change, but felt it would show weakness to admit he was wrong, or that he needed help etc.  This was a great photo into the mind of a teenager.  This was a great, easy read. 

 This book shows how important it is to “seek first to understand, then to be understood.”  In the story, the adults didn’t really know how to handle the teenager’s attitude, but a mysterious, guardian angle

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Out of Control on Time-out

“My almost 3 yo fights and kicks and cries when I take him to time-out (I have to carry him there), and then cries very loudly and even will scream at me when I’m telling him that he needs to stay there until he can become happy.  My husband thinks all of this is very disrespectful and feels that we need to spank him or do something different so that my son doesn’t do this.  He thinks I am teaching my son that it’s okay to fight me and scream at me.  What do you think?”

I understand your husband’s frustration, and yours.  Your child is definitely “out of instruction

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“Line upon Line”

The very first time I was asked to speak to a group of people about Teaching Self Government, I was in such a rush.  I tried to tell the audience everything they would need to make all the changes necessary to become the parents they wanted to be, and to have the learning environment for their children which they also wanted for family happiness. 

I remember talking so fast to try to squeeze in everything possible in the 50 minutes I had to speak.  It is funny to me that I even thought I could possibly squeeze my now one day seminar into 50 minutes 🙂 

I have learned a lot in these 9 yea

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My neighbors fight with my children…friend problems

My children love playing with the kids next door, but it seems that the neighbor kids do something rude/unkind every few weeks (or more often).  I’m not naive enough to believe that my kids are always totally without blame, but I am good friends with mother of these kids, and she has told me several times that this is pretty normal behavior for her kids and that my kids don’t act like that.  My kids (8 yo girl, 7 yo boy) have learned to pretty much just expect rude comments and behavior from the 9 yo neighbor boy and don’t have a lot to do with him anymore, but the 8 yo old girl

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Dealing with Friends part 4

How do you help your children stand up for what’s right without being “preachy” or “goody-goody”?

The most importantskill you can teach your child is how to determine what is right and what is wrong and how to choose right and stay away from wrong. This is the whole reason children need parents. If my child can’t match his outfits, doesn’t know how to do mathematics well, never changes his bed sheets, ortalks with his mouth full, it doesn’t really matter at all if he has mastered how to discern between what is right and what is wrong and chooses to follow right.

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Dealing with Friends part 3

How do you help your children respond appropriately to unkind behavior and deal with conflicts? 

I am assuming this question is referring to conflicts with friends and not siblings, although the conflicts aren’t too much different.  In fact, in most cases if we all treated each other like friends instead of siblings, we would all be much nicer to each other.  For some reason, most people treat strangers, and friends way better than fami

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Dealing with Friends part 2

 “How do these things change as your children get older?”

Too much friend time makes children selfish.  Children who are around peers too often start to think more about their peers than their family.  This focus on self encourages them to with draw from family. 

If children have limited contact with peers when they are young, they will most likely not become dependent upon having friends around for their happiness.  The last thing I want is a child who thinks that their happiness comes from something or someone else.  Happiness comes from inside us all, and for

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Dealing with Friends

How often do your children play with friends, and under what conditions?  How do these things change as your children get older?  How do you help your children respond appropriately to unkind behavior and deal with conflicts?  How do you help your children stand up for what’s right without being “preachy” or “goody-goody”?

These great questions about friends will take a few days to answer.  The answer to the first question is below. 

“How often do your children play wi

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Family Activities

Family activities don’t necessarily need to be elaborate!  I am a bit of a romantic, so I always try to think up things that sound memorable. 

Tonight we drove around our small town until we found a place that had a lot of leaves that needed to be raked up.  We made the ever traditional huge pile of leaves and jumped in, rolled around, buried each other, took pictures, and wrestled a bit.  Soon it was time to go.  (the draw back of daylight savings time)  We decided that we didn’t want to be done.  We wanted to take the fun home with us.  So, we quickly went home to get some strong garbage

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Changing generations

The Universe is governed by laws. One of those laws is that an older, wiser species comes before the new, innocent young of the same species to guide the younger toward right choices and acceptable behaviors. I have heard parents say before that their children didn’t come with instruction manuals. This is true, and each child is uniquely different, but I have wondered if parents make statements like these to make themselves feel better

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What is YOUR attitude like?

I have many posts on this site about how to change attitude problems in our children.  This is important to know how to do, but even more important for our family is knowing how to change our own attitude problems. 

Let’s face it, parenting is hard work!  There are many nights that I don’t even turn over in my bed, because my body is so tired, it would take too much effort.  Life is hard, but it doesn’t need to be miserable.  Part of self government, is knowing when you get to choose, and when you don’t.  Attitude is always your own choice. 

So what is YOUR attitude about your work as a

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Going against the grain.

There is an old saying which says, “Don’t put off until tomorrow what you can do today.” 

This is going to shock you all……WHY?   Seriously, I think this is sound advice for school assignments that are due, and remembering to put gas in the car, but after careful consideration, I have found that this advice about not procrastinating, can ruin the days and lives of some mothers. 

How many “homework” assignments do we constantly pile upon ourselves under the pretence of this old adage?  I have found myself canning until 2:00 a.m. when I have to wake up at 5:00 a.m.

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Balance for a mission mom?

How do you balance your mission with your family mission?  Obviously helping

others learn to teach their children self-government takes a good deal

of your time away from your family so I’d love some tips.  God has

inspired me to reach out more to others and share my talents, but I

sometimes find it difficult to find a good balance with my #1 mission

of raising my family.

This question is a classic!  I love it.  What ambitious Mommy doesn’t struggle with this?

You are right, I have to pull off quite a balancing act to manage all of my missions. 

The famil

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