Thank you so much for your teaching this subject! I purchased the CDs about two months ago when I heard about them through the LEMI mentors association, listened to them, took lots of notes, and put it into action at a family meeting about 3 weeks ago.
Parenting Questions ~ Tattling, Yelling, & Fighting Read More »
“I do struggle and maybe you could give me some advice. I spend quite a bit of time with my kids in the morning going over little activities like school workbooks and story time and exercising together. Yet the minute I get on the phone or sit down to nurse the baby, the three boys are arguing or fighting or taking toys from each other or something of the sort. I have tried to get them to color or do a certain activity together, but that only lasts so long. It’s
“Mom is on the phone” Read More »
Thank you so much for your teaching this subject! I purchased the CDs about two months ago when I heard about them through the LEMI mentors association, listened to them, took lots of notes, and put it into action at a family meeting about 3 weeks ago. It has been so helpful! It has already made a big difference in our home!
My eight year old son was having trouble obeying the first time i.e. following instruction, and we would ask him again and again to do things and he wouldn’t do them. He would forget or get distracted reading. (He’s a white, through and through.) Then we would get angry and he would do it. But he would sometimes get angry and lately even sometimes go into a little bit of a rage.
Success Stories and Some Questions Read More »
A parent says, “Billy, come make your bed.”
Billy doesn’t come immediately so the parent says,”One…….Two………Three.” to get Billy to come.
Have you ever done this? Everyone knows Billy better start running either at or before his mom hits the number three or else Mom could turn into a monster.
As I travel around, I notice counting to three as possibly the most common parenting control method. Counting has it’s place in parenting, but the counting in the above story is either a threat, a power struggle, or a sign of a parent who doesn’t real
Have You Ever Done This? Read More »
…my 6 year old is up to his old tricks. He
LOVED following instructions when I first started concentrating on this.
But, today, he became his regular difficult self. He hasn’t been
following instructions and when I tell him he’s earned a chore, he won’t
do the chore. And when I try the Rule of 3, he’ll calm down and then
still won’t follow through with his chores.
He has tried to solicit help from me (while I’m trying to make dinner for him)–I told him I’d like to
help him, but I have to make dinner right now. Then, he just starts goofing off with the r
Sneaky Six Year Old Read More »
My children love playing with the kids next door, but it seems that the neighbor kids do something rude/unkind every few weeks (or more often). I’m not naive enough to believe that my kids are always totally without blame, but I am good friends with mother of these kids, and she has told me several times that this is pretty normal behavior for her kids and that my kids don’t act like that. My kids (8 yo girl, 7 yo boy) have learned to pretty much just expect rude comments and behavior from the 9 yo neighbor boy and don’t have a lot to do with him anymore, but the 8 yo old girl
My neighbors fight with my children…friend problems Read More »
The Universe is governed by laws. One of those laws is that an older, wiser species comes before the new, innocent young of the same species to guide the younger toward right choices and acceptable behaviors. I have heard parents say before that their children didn’t come with instruction manuals. This is true, and each child is uniquely different, but I have wondered if parents make statements like these to make themselves feel better
Changing generations Read More »
On September 11th I wrote a post titled “For Crying out Loud ~ Screaming” This was the first screaming post. I am now adding another part to screaming, because I have another question.
My almost-5-year-old has always been a screamer. He screams this
high-pitched, shrill, grating scream whenever he doesn’t like
something that’s going on — which is often. This screaming pushes
my buttons like nothing else does. I HATE it, and I’m afraid I’ve
reacted to it too strongly and too wrongly, for too long.
So, is this kind of screaming a normal thing for a kid before he ge
“I’m having trouble figuring out what behavior is
“normal” for my 4- and 8-year-old boys, what chores I can expect them
to be able to perform, and what kinds of rewards and consequences
work for the different ages. Is there a good book you can suggest?
Or is that something I need to tailor for my own boys (i.e.
What should I expect? Read More »
“I have been reading your website and listening to your CD’s and practicing what I’ve learned from you. It has helped tremendously with the level of peace in our home. A situation occurred last night with my 12 y/o which has me a bit stymied. He was at a church camp-out and playing flag football with some other boys. One boy in particular has given him trouble on and off through the two years we have lived here. This boy will slap my son and then say it was a joke, yell at hi
Fighting with non-family members Read More »
“Some of my kids have developed bad habits such as finger-sucking, nose picking (and eating it), fingernail chewing, and touching their genitals. Do you have any experience or advice on helping children successfully break these kinds of habits? Some of my children have started doing such things from the time they are babies (finger-sucking), or have developed the habits a little later at around age 3 or so. And one daughter in particular seems particularly prone to this type of thing (she’s eight now).”
I did have some youth who had behaviors which are not social
“Help! I’ve been browing your website for a couple of days. Trying to find some answers- If I had the $ I’d be sending for the cd’s. But it’s not in the budget right now. I’m totally at my wits end with my 6 yr old.
I don’t know what else to do. He is ADHD- We’ve had him in with a counselor, and I have an appointment to talk about meds this afternoon. I don’t want to do meds for adhd, but I have to try something, because everything I’ve tried isn’t working. He’s only 6! I really don’t want to do meds, but I don’t know what else to try.
Should I Medicate? Read More »
We got home late. My four year old fell asleep on the way home. After waking up, he came in to go potty, get dressed and go to bed. From the bathroom I heard crying. He was in there for a long time. He was in the bathroom trying to clean up a mess that he had made in his pants.It was very stressful and disturbing to him to find a dirty pants problem. This stress along with his extreme tiredness made him very sad and he just couldn’t help crying.
A reader wrote to me telling me about a young neighborhood child that introduced things of a sexual nature to her daughter. This is not a fun subject. I have been avoiding putting it on the site, but the more I think about it, this topic is probably one of the biggest things parents face. How do we keep our children free from the disease of sexual impurity that seems to be taking over our world? How do we make them aware while not taking away their innocence?
The Times We Live In Part 1 Read More »
I was sitting on the couch today going over plans for our next trip when my six year old daughter, Londyn, sat down next to me and said, “We have to go to Virginia because you want to make the world better, don’t you? Not just our family, but other families too.” I said, “Yes” and smiled. I didn’t need to say anything else. It was very clear to me that she had developed an understanding of my mission. As a family, we talk about mission a lot. We try to analyze what other people’s missions might be. We talk about what kinds of skills we need to develop to find our personal mission
Mission By Example Read More »
Nicholeen,
I have one problem I have not figured out how to resolve. My son (6)is a great kid, but there is one thing that sets him off every time to the point that he hits, kicks, screams, says unkind things, and basically acts like the whole world is against him so why try. This happens every time without fail when he is caught with poopy pants.
Poopy Pants and Tantrums Read More »
Nicholeen, I have a 9-year old boy. He is a typical 9-year old boy, I believe, in that his mind (and mouth) is constantly going 200 miles an hour. His siblings are always waiting for him to stop talking so they can get a word in edgewise. He is full of ideas and loves to take things apart. We are having a problem with bedtime. He goes to bed just fine, but once there, he won’t go to sleep. We let him read for about 15-30 minutes once he’s in bed, then we come down and turn the lights out (for him and his younger brother who is 4).
“It’s Time To Go To Bed.” Read More »
Even after we teach our children how to follow an instruction or how to accept a NO answer, our children will sometimes forget that they can choose to say, “OK”. The other day I told my son that he needed to clean his room. I could tell that he didn’t want to do the task. His face started to pout. The second I saw this, I said, “Porter, say OK.” He looked right at me and said, “OK!” Then I praised him. It is alright to tell them exactly what to say. This helps them problem solve the very situation they are in. The child then gets the opportunity to see how easy it is to make the rig
Tell Them What to Say Read More »
