When one of our foster daughters lived with us years ago, she did something that the others hadn’t done. She spent the first few weeks very intently watching me. She watched the way I kept house, the way I parented my children, the time I spent reading scriptures and good books, etc.

Posted by Nicholeen Peck on September 11, 2019

Sacrifice is vital for happiness. Most people think the word “sacrifice” is bad and sounds like a hardship, not a joyful journey. Happiness sounds much better! But without giving up some of our indulgences, excuses and time wasters, it’s difficult to accomplish the things that bring the most happiness, like fulfilling our roles as parents and living the missions God has in store for us. What’s your mission? Do you feel called to, “Feed the hungry, clothe the naked, heal the sick, teach the ignorant, comfort the lonely, create beauty, liberate the captives, or preach the gospel”? (Oliver DeMille) These eight missions appear repeatedly throughout history as ways people change the world and others’ lives for good. Does one of these missions stand out to you? Did you know that being a parent covers all eight of these missions? What will we sacrifice to do our very best at our …

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Posted by Monica Pond on June 6, 2018

There is an international parent/child bonding problem. The world has never seen a global lack of parent/child attachment like this before. Of course, there are factors leading to this detachment, factors that the world has also never seen before. Are we experimenting on our families and children and calling it good leadership? Have we given up our roles in the family for social conformity, loss of identity, and cluelessness? I know I’m not going to win many points with diligent, loving parents by calling them clueless. I’m not intending to be mean, but every day I see video after video that laughs at what parents don’t know. Comedians and YouTubers have never-ending fodder for their acts if parenting is continually equal to a joke. If parents are overly tough, people will laugh. If parents are passive, people will laugh. If parents are worn out and have attitude problems, people will …

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Posted by Monica Pond on November 1, 2017

April asked how the song is supposed to sound so that she could use it. All the words to the song are : Every time you’re silly (Hold this last y note for 3 counts) somebody always gets hurt. Go to a piano. Middle C C D D EG (hold for three counts) F F F E E D C (hold for three counts)

Posted by Nicholeen Peck on April 13, 2008

Relationships require selfless service to survive. Although there are multiple reasons people site for their relationship dysfunctions, from infidelity to arguments, relationship problems usually all have two things in common: dishonesty and selfishness. According to The Institute For Family Studies, the leading causes of divorce are: infidelity, incompatibility, drinking or drug use, growing apart, a lack of commitment, and too much arguing. In my own studies of families who are working to overcome dysfunctional family relationships and fractured family bonds through Teaching Self-Government parenting services, I’ve noticed that the main causes of broken or damaged family bonds can be grouped into a handful of reasons. These reasons include: lack of communication, laziness, not valuing family, arguing and fights, lies and manipulations, excuses for bad behavior, disrespect for parental authority and position of the child, losing common values, and only being concerned with one’s own feelings and wants. Every reason listed …

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Posted by Monica Pond on December 28, 2020

It’s often said that “a mother’s work is never done.” There are multiple ways to see this sentiment. Either Mother never does her work, or Mother always has a task that needs doing, or perhaps that Mother is a mother no matter the age of her children. The first interpretation gives a negative and lazy view of Mother. The second seems to make Mother into a martyr to household chores. But, the third interpretation of this common saying offers wisdom and a vision of Mother’s key role in the lives of her family members forever. The focus of this article is this third interpretation. No matter how old her children and grandchildren grow, a mother is always invested in their welfare and concerned about their happiness and moral success. A few years ago, I came across a letter written by a mother during World War Two. It was a response …

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Posted by Monica Pond on May 9, 2018

Family travel looks different these days than it used to. Today’s parents were raised in a slower time. Most families planned one or two trips a year, which were usually taken during school holidays, and in our case, in the family travel trailer. While there are still families that really don’t like to leave home for even one night (even though I don’t know any of them myself), the average household spends 2 percent of its annual income on travel expenses. A family’s average cost of travel is $4,700 per year according to Value Penguin and $4,300 per vacation according to Stuffed Suitcase. Many families spend around 30 days on vacation annually. What impact do all those travel days have on family relationships? I think the hope is that they be positive. Parents have always known that to create lasting memories, families need to have shared experiences for extended periods …

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Posted by Monica Pond on June 18, 2018

A few years ago, Paije, my daughter who was seven at the time, asked me, “Why do all the ants get flustered when the leaf drops in their path on the movie Bugs Life?” What a question. I had never really taken the time to analyze that part of the movie; probably because I never really liked that show.

Posted by Nicholeen Peck on November 9, 2017

One of the primary roles of parents is to be a leader of their children. Dedicated, motivated parents are usually one of two kinds of leaders; ambitious leaders or led leaders. While ambition seems like a powerful quality in a leader, it’s flawed because ambition is self-serving. On the other hand, a leader who is a good follower of truth, principles, and a higher moral authority, even if it is inconvenient to themselves or lacks showiness is a powerful influence for good in the lives of their children. In this article, I’ll refer to this second type of leader as a led leader.This new global quarantine has turned every home into a homeschool and has removed the possibility for most activities that parents are accustomed to using to keep their children busy. Consequently, parents are stepping up to the parenting and education plate like never before. Sure, some parents feel …

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Posted by Monica Pond on April 7, 2020

There are so many things in our society today that say, “Look at me! Follow me! I’ll make you happy!” A lot of these things are worthwhile pursuits — making a living, spending time with friends, serving in the community, and pursuing hobbies. While these are good things, we passionately believe this quote from Elder L. Tom Perry — that the greatest happiness you’ll ever feel in this life will come from investing in your family.

Posted by Chelsea on June 26, 2015

In a world full of sexual depravity, diverse addictions, familial dysfunction, lascivious social platforms, manipulative media, and irate people of all ages, is it possible to even hope for our children to have an innocent upbringing? A routine trip through a store like Walmart, for example, can start a child’s brain processing in sexual and dysfunctional directions. What is a parent to do about this problem? How can a family live in the world but not become part of all the lewdness and cruelty so many people in society are laughing at? The Illusion of Innocence: Living in the World For many years I’ve taken my children, and often other children I teach, to the Utah Shakespeare Festival. Every time prior to attending, I call the festival and check to be sure the play is developmentally appropriate for children and will preserve their innocence. This year I asked the usual …

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Posted by Monica Pond on November 16, 2017

“Go long Porter!” said Dad to his 15-year-old son as they played Frisbee in the circle in front of our home. Dad and Porter throw Frisbees regularly in the evening. Am I mad that my husband is playing games with his son instead of helping me with the dinner preparation? No way! That play time is more vital that even he realizes. In fact, it’s because of that play time that Porter wants to work with his dad and be like his dad one day. It’s also one of the big factors in Porter’s confidence and high standards.Sometimes dads are given criticism for being a little bit too light-hearted, playful, or getting the children all wound up at the wrong times — like when it’s time for bed.When I was a little girl my dad would say, “Time for bed. How are we getting there tonight?” At this point, we …

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Posted by Monica Pond on June 13, 2019