Making Toddler Store Time Happy

Mommy's "Said Okay" Song

Have you ever been in the store and heard a small child ask their parent for a candy bar, or a toy? Most resonable parents don't go around buying everything their child asks for, so the parent usually says, "No, not today." For many children an answer like this causes crying, whinning, pouting, yelling and many other childhood outbursts.

My kind of parenting is called, Teaching Self-Government. We focus on teaching our children how to control their emotional responses so that they can be more happy. No one is happy having a tantrum. One of the four basic skills I teach my children is accepting "No" answers. To accept a “No” answer you look at the person, keep a calm voice, face, and body, say okay and drop the subject.

My children love to say okay to “No” answers. When they are babies I teach them the word okay as one of their first words. Whenever my small children say okay to “No” answers I sing a funny little praise song which lets them know they have done a good thing. I sing, “Porter said okaaay, Porter said okaaay. Okaaay, okaaay, Porter said okaaay.” Then they giggle and smile.

They love to accept “No” answers.My children have all loved to accept “No” answers at the store the very most.

When we go to the store, they ask for something, like candy, and I say, “I’m going to give you a “No” answer. No, we are not buying candy today.” Then the small child does the steps to accepting a “No” answer and says okay. Then I have to do my funny song in the middle of the store. They love it! And of course after one child gets the song for a “No” answer, then the other little child has to ask for something too and hope for a “No” answer. Have fun. “No” answers can make a great shopping game.