My daughter is pulling away from going to school – many issues (same kid we had the police out for last week) she seems to be running insanely high anxiety and she can function. She refused to get out of bed till 2pm – decided she was going to do her own school – I said I had an outline and she just screamed at me and said “I will do my own – I won’t work with you you idiot!!”
I gave her a correction but she nestles away and it calms her down to do what’s in her head and it was positive so I left her. She Did a maths worksheet but when I reviewed it and asked some questions she screamed and walked off, "I am not redoing them!" "Leave me alone – you are so horrible!! stop making it about YOU saying that you are better than me!" But she goes off and does work…she comes back later somewhat calm and said “see you think I am so dumb but you can’t do these in your head” (even though they are all wrong) right now I am just letting her go roll and letting her know that she’s not being calm but I am not giving extra consequences, I am just taking it that she’s not calm and can’t talk about starting the 24hours to have her devices (the main privilege that she has lost by just not following instructions…although she hasn’t heard that she’s lost it for 24 hours yet, but we have removed them) I plan to discuss with her once she is calm that it’s 24hours…
I believe that she will come out of this panic pattern as I stay calm, just checking that’s okay to not add more consequences or exercises till she’s calm and to simply verbally state a correction and to drop the subject myself because she’s giving me a no answer to being calm. I intend to take her to sport and music as these are “education” and are part of her curriculum.