Manipulative

My daughter (age 9) seems to be verbally manipulative. For example, if she is upset with receiving a consequence she will start saying things like, “that Nicholeen Peck…she has bad ideas, her ideas don’t work, why do we have to do that, Nicholeen Peck is stupid.”
Also, when she is playing and I mention an instruction for school or regular chore, she will act like she doesn’t hear me/acts like she is in her own world. She will sometimes throw her math book on the floor if she doesn’t understand/want to do a problem. This happens after a few minutes of work. Not fatigue at the end of a longer work session. She has a roles problem and we have been working on it, but I’m and ultimately worried about the relationship between us.