Roles and tone

Aaron says “hi”. The highlight of his 2023-2024 school year was helping you demonstrate the skills. He accepted a “no” answer well at the last session. He was thrilled he got to help at all! Ben was struggling at the end of the last session so we were unable to come say “good-bye” in the vendor hall.

Praying Paije is doing well.

My question is about roles and tone. My kids parent each other and even Ted and I. We are reminding them that it is not their role. That what they did is a parent role. I did a session with them during homeschool where we wrote down the role they do have and what it looks like and the role of a parent, but I think to them parenting and being a sibling looks similar. How can I help them to replace “parent” with amazing and awesome sister or brother? Correcting them doesn’t seem to be working so I would like to tell them “this is what you should have done instead”, but with roles. Can you help me with ideas of what this could look like? They say “I need you to do your Math” or “I need you to do your chores” or “I need you to pick up your mess” or “I need you to leave Ben alone” or “I need you to put Ben down”. Is there a way for them to talk to each other that is sibling words and not parent words? These words lead to arguing. I tell them that if there is arguing then a step in a skill isn’t happening or they are stepping into the parent role and we need to figure out what step was missed or what role they are stepping into. Sometimes they are just trying to help me and take over the situation to help, but it doesn’t go well. How can they be for each other and not against each other when they tell one another what to do?