Privileges

I’ve listened through module 5lesson 9. You mentioned withholding privileges for 24 hrs when the child doesn’t stay for the correction (leaves). I’m sure you explain it later on, but how is this different from the power struggle of taking something away. Phone being what we used to use as the privilege our 14 yr old would loose due to you name it. We realize that is a power struggle and have stopped doing that but I’m not sure how to implement the 24 hr privilege loss without it feeling like a power struggle. We currently have not started explaining any of these techniques to our kids (14,12,8) because we want to get a good understanding first, however day to day life continues and we have started at least not power struggling and have implemented chores as a consequence for not doing as told when clearly instructed and those two thing are already helping a ton. The 14 yr old is the one we struggle with the most, 12 yr old is very good natured and a pleaser, and 8 yr old is pretty good and we are working with him too on following through but honestly the 14 yr old has required so much of our attention and we are doing the best we can with balancing. Also dad has a big job, mom works part time as a therapist and has work do once she gets home. There are sports and school work and caring for a grandparent. We are so busy and truly doing our best to no over commit. We do family meals and get time together as much as we can.