Meeting a defiant teen with calmness

(This is a question from a mother taking my three-part Calm and Effective Parenting class series. I addressed her question in class as well as I could, but I told her I would ask you on the support group as well, because you would be able to add more layers. I had her write out her own question, so these are her words. Thanks!)

How do you deal with a straight up defiant child/ teenager? When the correction of adding a chore or more work for them wouldn’t work when you can’t get them to do even simple things, ie get up out of bed for school or go to school?
My son, 15, has gotten to a point where I can’t get him to do anything unless it’s something he wants to do (going out with friends or being on his phone) or he’s getting his way or it benefits him. I can’t get him out to get out of the bed in the mornings for school and on the days we get to the school, 45 minutes late, I can’t get him out of the car. I like the idea of the corrections, but if I can’t get him to do anything I don’t know how the corrections would work. And meeting that with calmness is extremely hard for me.