Kids out of instructional control

When the rule of three has been applied and the children are still choosing to be out of instructional control before they start there 24 hours of loss of privileges, they are in a phase where they are supposed to be missing out of privileges. How do I make them miss out on privileges at this time? Do I by force take them away? For example their books, drawing pads, ect, also friend time. How do I stop them from having friend time when they just walk out and spend time with their friends? What I have tended to do in the past, not wanting to have a power struggle with them and not sure what else to do is just leave them and take away the privileges that I can control.