Full correction for preteen/teenagers

Hi, unfortunately I am dealing with a 13-year-old that is starting to lie and yelling at me. When I asked him during a calm moment WHY he yells at me he said that it’s the only way he can get me to stop talking. What he is referring to is when I am discussing how he wasn’t following an instruction and doing it right away, which is a problem every single day, it seems.

I sense that he’s starting to go through puberty and some of this is part of that problem, as well, but I want to stop these behaviors! I would like your suggestions. There is also something that seems to always catch me offguard. When I hear you speak about doing the full correction, for example in your YouTube video about lying teenagers, and other times, I get a little confused about what it means to give the full correction.

The rule of three at first sounds like a good idea, And I’ve tried to use it but after the first part of it, it doesn’t go well. when I preach the entire process of the rule of three, I get hung up with the third part of it where they have a loss of privileges. Imagining this working for us hard for us right now to enforce. Our kids are in school and outside activities for school that we consider commitments. They don’t get any screens during the week, normally. They don’t see any other friends during the week besides at school, and often times don’t see any friends other than church youth group on the weekend, either. So it’s hard to know what kind of privileges to take away, plus, it just seems like a very busy time. Fortunately that only lasts about seven more weeks from now for the 13year old as his 2 sports will be finished for the season. Are there any other options for the third consequence in the rule of three that I can use?

I’ve also never been able to use the second consequence, because he seems to think that sodas are too babyish, and right now he has such a severe motivation problem at times. It feels daunting to expect him to fill out the sodas forms. I haven’t yet been successful with that.

He has received the 30 minute major maintenance before and sometimes he actually enjoys it when I am there working with him. Other times, he is completely unmotivated and doesn’t complete it before bedtime, even with me nearby.

He’s a child that gets overwhelmed easily, so I am having a hard time knowing what kind of correction to give him! Thanks for your suggestions.

Also, I would like to be linked with a mentor. How do I get that set up?