Guidelines for Success
You don't have to be an expert to participate in a TSG Circle. Remember that the whole point of Circles are to encourage everyone–including those with little or no background or expertise in self-governance–to (re)examine their lives and make the effort and commitment to improve with the support and synergy of the Circle.
1. Listen–really listen. Active listening includes not thinking about what you are going to say next. If you can really hear what others are saying, the group's discussion will be far more interesting, and you will learn much more.
2. Be honest. People in the group want to hear what you really think, not what you think you should say. Consider your feelings and that of your group; share only what you are comfortable with and what you think others will feel comfortable hearing. Public confessions or making our lives an open book, gossip or super negative observations…think twice before sharing
3. Be open (be humble, be teachable) to new viewpoints and new ideas. Each of us comes to the Circle with a different perspective.
4. Reaching consensus on any given topic is not the objective of a TSG Circle. The goals are: learning, sharing, and becoming more self-governing. Even when you disagree, respect others–their views, their opinions, and, most important, their beliefs. How you say things may be as important as what you say.
5. Do your bestto understand your differences and respect them. Don't rush to smooth over differences.
6. Choose your words carefully. Don't monopolize the conversation. Conversely, don't be a silent observer. Everyone has a valuable perspective to share. If you are prone to excessive talking, perhaps you can make a concerted effort to notice those who are less vocal in your group. Find an opportunity to elicit their response. You, along with the facilitator, can support even the most timid group member. Don't be afraid of silence. Such lulls in conversation allow time to think, process and some people are actually encouraged by the silence to share their thoughts. The diversity of experiences, perspectives and sharing of both struggles and successes is what the circle is all about. Your voice, alongwith everyone else's, needs to be heard.
7. Come prepared. Read the materials (if you have time review the other resources available online). Reflect on your own experience. A good discussion depends on every group member bringing his or her best thinking to the discussion–as well as his or her feelings and beliefs.
8. Be willing to commit and contribute to the group. Consider the needs of the members and the time and talents you have. Find a way that you can contriubute. Perhaps you could share the role of Discussion Facilitator, provide snacks, host the meeting, send reminders, assist in recruiting other members, or touch basewith others during the month to offer support and words of encouragement. Grow toward the vision of being a person who withholdsjudgement, resiststhe urge to fix others, and offersthe same loyalty and tact that you seek. As you become the person you truly are, you will make asignificant contributionthat will create a safe place for everyone to grow.
RESOURCES:
http://www.pbs.org/wnet/genesis/discuss.html
http://www.pioneernetwork.net/Data/Documents/LearningCircleKeane.pdf