Rachael Ward

Our family of seven has lived in Charleston, South Carolina for the last thirteen years. We have a married daughter in Idaho, an almost married twenty-one year old son in college, a seventeen year old daughter also in college, and a thirteen year old son and eleven year old daughter at home still. I learned about Teaching Self-Government (TSG) over ten years ago when we had five children at home, ages twelve and under. I'm pretty calm by nature but there are so many parenting situations that were hard to know how to handle and we had such a range of ages and challenges to address, including a child with ADHD, that some days I felt crazy with the chaos. When I learned about TSG, the principles resonated in my heart because they were truths we already wanted to live by but now we knew how and everything fit into a bigger, better picture. We created a family vision, family government, and worked on learning the four basic skills. I read my favorite TSG book, Roles, out loud with the kids and shared it with other parents. I knew we were making progress in the direction we wanted to go; there was more calmness in the home because I was governing myself better and the kids knew what to expect. Working with out of control teens was a struggle for me, though. I hadn’t developed the skills to help them have a change of heart when they were disrespectful. This past year, as our youngest two began their teen years, I decided to rededicate myself to Teaching Self-Government. I studied Nicholeen’s youtube videos and books which helped me get back on track. I quickly felt an increase in peace and positivity in our home. I wanted to get better at living these principles as well as share them with others so I began taking TSG classes online. One of the coolest things about the class was how we set goals and reported back to the group on a regular basis. I finally spent time developing skills for intensive teaching. I shared everything with my husband and even kids already out of the home, and those at home got the benefit of role playing and more discussion. My husband really got on board with using the same language. My thirteen year old son felt so empowered he even wrote a speech for his debate class about how the four skills can solve 99.9% of all problems. I want to share my excitement for self-government with everyone and continue to strengthen our family! I know that these are true principles and anyone can apply them and improve their situation.