Aggressive 2 year old boy. How do I teach a 2 year old self government please?

Hello Nicholeen,
Thanks for the opportunity!
My 2 year old son is very aggressive and super strong willed. When he doesn't get his way he tenses up his body curls up his fist and says angryyyyyyyy!
He hits us in the face or anywhere he can if we don't hold his hands and even then he uses his feet. Sometimes he calls his sister's stupid( he picked up this word from an older child). I tried to put him on a chair this morning and asked him to calm down there and his 4 year old sister and I started breathing and he got angrier and started throwing himself on the floor. Yesterday I gave him a bowl of porridge with crushed flaxseeds and then I stirred the flaxseeds in he said angrily noo and threw the bowl of porridge on the floor. He loves flaxseeds but I realised that he didn't want me to stir it in.
It makes me so sad that he has such a temper at 2! When he is not angry he is so sweet and caring I just can't believe how he can get so aggressive. My girls were not so uncontrollable it was so much easier to manage them so I don't know what to do. I have a new baby on the way and I want to nip this in the bud asap so that he is safe. How do I teach him self government what do I say to him to teach him the four skills? And how do I get him to stop saying stupid?
Please help!
P.S I just saw the good news of the children's ebook so I will buy those I don't know if it will help but any other tips would be greatly appreciated please. Thsnks