Unity

We have been doing Parenting United for one month together but I am noticing that our marriage relationship is may we where we need to start. I take my husband’s criticism of my parenting personally. He works long hard hours and comes home and tells me how I am doing things wrong and too soft on them. And he says I give one kid too much leeway. Then the kids jump on that band wagon and say those things to me during the day while he is at work. It is so hard! I have a long way to go with this and this is not easy. We need to be United. We need to be calm and not yell or be critical with each other. What do the 4 skills look like in marriage? How are they similar and different from what we do with the kids? Thank you.