New to the call and program

Hi Nicholeen! I just started this program and still have so much to learn. But my 12 year old is being so unkind, not helpful and disrespectful. I have to implement something now, what would you recommend? This transition from elementary school to middle school has been uncomfortable for the both of us…. primarily me. Apparently over night I became this huge embarrasing person, I can't look at her, talk to her in front of her friends… radio has to be down or off , windows up during pick up or drop off … I'm scared to make eye contact with her sometimes just to respect her wishes … however, they are so unnecessary and over the top I find myself angry for going along with this type of nonesese and end up flipping out. Let me add to "what the nonsence is". I'm an energetic and enthusiatic person…. she calls me "extra" and I get it. Last years dance she hated going clothes shopping so I'd buy 8 dresses with the intentions to take 7 back, but giving her an option because I thought that would be nice and helpful. She eats lunch at 10:30, so i have a snack ready every day when i get her from school. I'm really into motivational quotes and I put them in her lunch box from time to time. I'll check her bookback for broken or pencils that need to be replaced…. I go out of my way to buy special containers to make her lunches fun because she wont eat at school and she is a picky eater. I just get picked on and made fun of more so than a thank you for being thoughtful and going out of my way for her. I work full time and am a single mom. I am fortunate to be comfortable with our finances. However, she's 12 and because of this crazy social media craze and Drunk Elephant skincare… I actually got yelled at over Christmas because I purchased it and she wanted it. She was terrible to me… My childhood was nothing like this. Matter of fact, at 13 I got a workers permit and took the city bus and had a part time job. about a month ago, the daily crying got better… I'm certainly not trying to be cool (but I'm so tired of hearing I'm not – Because i didn't ask and I'm not trying too be) and I'm not trying to be your friend. Her birthday was last weekend and i could hear her talk about me (more like mumbling) and rolling her eyes and laughing at me …. I'm humiliated and ashamed she's my daughter sometimes. I'm not that embarrsing… I don't say anything. I know I can parent like my parents did, because they beat my butt with a belt and we've never laid a hand