Index: Skills

Sacrifice is vital for happiness. Most people think the word “sacrifice” is bad and sounds like a hardship, not a joyful journey. Happiness sounds much better! But without giving up some of our indulgences, excuses and time wasters, it’s difficult to accomplish the things that bring the most happiness, like fulfilling our roles as parents and living the missions God… Read more »

By Dr. Mark Wanstall Yes,The World’s Strictest Parents —from the production companyTwentytwenty, broadcast since 2007 on BBC3 — is another ‘reality TV’ programme. Yes it’s formulaic, possibly even exploitative of all involved; and the morality tale outcomes are nearly always simplistic and predictable. But there is aprofound truththat speaks to us — if we can focus on the bigger picture… Read more »

Let’s be careful not to bully our children into not being bullies. In a recent Huffington Post article a mother talked about how she taught her daughter”to damn well treat people right.” (Sorry for the language. That washer exact quote.) In the article the motherthreatened her daughter with no ride to school if the daughter didn’t include another girl in… Read more »

April asked how the song is supposed to sound so that she could use it. All the words to the song are : Every time you’re silly (Hold this last y note for 3 counts) somebody always gets hurt. Go to a piano. Middle C C D D EG (hold for three counts) F F F E E D C… Read more »

I recently asked a group of 10-year-old children what kinds of negative consequences their families have. “At our house, we sweep the floor and clean,” said one boy. “Mom gets mad and goes into a bad mood,” said another boy. “Mom used to send us to time out, but we don’t do that anymore,” said a thoughtful girl. I asked… Read more »

Relationships require selfless service to survive. Although there are multiple reasons people site for their relationship dysfunctions, from infidelity to arguments, relationship problems usually all have two things in common: dishonesty and selfishness. According to The Institute For Family Studies, the leading causes of divorce are: infidelity, incompatibility, drinking or drug use, growing apart, a lack of commitment, and too… Read more »

The Norton’s Following Instructions https://vimeo.com/79351576 The Norton’s Accepting Consequences https://vimeo.com/79351574 Siblings Disagree Appropriately Over Computer Last week my post was about sibling rivalry. Here is a movie which shows how knowing to Disagree Appropriately is a skill which helps sibling rivalry. https://vimeo.com/82252485 This sibling rivalry solution video was filmed while I was doing some private self-government teaching for a family.… Read more »

https://vimeo.com/79141936… Read more »

https://player.vimeo.com/video/79138486?app_id=122963   Pre-teaching helps your children to decrease anxiety and increase confidence in their Self-Government skills.… Read more »

“Look Mom, this water bottle has a description. The water is described as ‘mouth-watering water,” said Porter with a chuckle. “This water calls itself smart, but I’m not sure that description seems very smart,” he added. This was too much for me. I completely broke down into a laughing attack over this ridiculous notion that this water I was drinking… Read more »

“Another question I had was, does the rule of 3 start over for each incident? Are the 3 consequences for staying out of instructional control as relating to the first incident? I just want to make sure I understand correctly. So if a child hits his brother, and gets out of instructional control and has the consequences for that earlier… Read more »

How does 24 hours loss of privilegeswork in your house? Let’s say a13 year old boydoesn’t want to get on board. Buthe shouldn’t be allowed to just hole up in his room away from the rest of the family!However, I have foundthat sending him to sit on his bed is the most effective thingthat can be done. Consequences are so… Read more »