Out of Instructional Control
Showing 1–12 of 94 results

Using The Bedroom As A Consequence
How does 24 hours loss of privilegeswork in your house? Let’s say a13 year old boydoesn’t want to get on board. Buthe shouldn’t be allowed to just hole up in his room away from the rest of the family!However, I have foundthat sending him to sit on his bed is the most effective thingthat can be done. Consequences are so individual. I don’t expe
Posted by Nicholeen Peck on July 17, 2008

Toddler Tantrums: Positive Parenting Solutions
Nicholeen, Your peaceful parenting methods obviously work so well with older children and troubled teenagers. But, I have a house full of little children. Each day I face terrible twos, three year old tantrums, and four year old tantrums. Can children this young learn to govern themselves too?Answer: How ToStopTantrumsThis article is NOT just fortoddlers. Parenting toddlers is difficult. Many parents wonder ifthey must forever keep practicing reactive parenting. They know there must be some way to teach toddlers and small children to learn self-government.The funny thing is, I think I get asked this question equally as often as I get asked, โNicholeen, learning self-government is obviously easy for small children, and your methods are perfect for that. But, what about big kids and teens?โSo, my question for you is, why do we doubt the new skills and communication methods will do any good for our children; no matter the …
Posted by Nicholeen Peck on September 5, 2012

Time-Out Talk
I should have corrected him right there, but for some reason, I let him whine at me. It is always better to correct all negative behaviors as soon as possible.
Posted by Nicholeen Peck on July 16, 2008

They Keep Getting Angry!
โHi Nicholeen, I have been working hard to implement the principles you have taught me. I have seen a huge difference in how I parent and respond to my children. However, there has been one side effect I was not expecting. Because of my poor parenting in the past, they have developed a habit of responding with ange
Posted by Nicholeen Peck on December 6, 2017
Support Call 9-7-18
This Call Covers: Correcting silly behaviors in children staying calm as a parent Healthy praise Healing relationships with emotional walls
Posted by Nicholeen Peck on September 13, 2018
Support Call 9-4-15
This call covers: Why I love having a garden Helping slower children speed things up Keeping calm when children explode and start to threaten Using TSG as a grandparent Stopping mumbling
Posted by Nicholeen Peck on September 13, 2015
Support Call 9-23-20
Whole Call: https://s3.amazonaws.com/1-SupportCalls/2020/09September/TSG_SC_9-23-20_WholeEdited.mp3 Question: I love all that I am learning and becoming with Teaching Self Government, especially that giving up control and honoring agency doesn’t have to lead to chaos… But sometimes it does. ๐ We held the paper airplanes simulation in our family, and when we debriefed it, our kids were all over the place, being goofy and random. Maybe I should have waited–served ice cream and chatted and then debriefed. This is a frequent problem. We are a fun, large family, and love to bring up new and unusual topics, interesting or funny. Our conversations are interesting, but I’ve found myself being to teach simple conversational skills, like not interrupting. Small surprise. We like to have fun, so how can we bring conversations back to calm when we need to?ย Answer: https://s3.amazonaws.com/1-SupportCalls/2020/09September/TSG_SC_9-23-20_Q1.mp3 My father used to always say, โThere is a time and a place for …
Posted by Nicholeen Peck on September 28, 2020
Support Call 9-18-15
This call covers: My child, age 6, can’t even look at me when I’m giving him an instruction. How can he follow an instruction if he can’t even look at me? My 5-year-old son is great at telling me what to do when he earns an extra chore, but when he actually earns one, he goes completely out of control. What do I do? My husband doesn’t like to participate in family meetings. Is it possible to have meetings without Dad? Can we still have family unity? My children don’t like to redo things when they do something wrong. How do I help them participate in redoing a situation? How many times can you go into the Rule of Three? My son keeps getting distracted and I’ll start it, then he’ll calm down. But three minutes later, we’ll be back in the same place all over again. How does this …
Posted by Nicholeen Peck on September 23, 2015
Support Call 9-11-19
This Call Covers:Teenage children who refuse to be part of the TSG systemChildren who are confused on their role in the family
Posted by Nicholeen Peck on September 13, 2019
Support Call 9-11-15
This call covers: How to deal with obstinate behaviors of a 3rd grader and a 9th grader. Learning how to praise better and getting away from personal negativity. Fixing the feelings of failure in parenting.
Posted by Nicholeen Peck on September 16, 2015
Support Call 9-02-16
This call covers: Twin 6-year-old boys who struggle with lying, cheating, and stealing. New to the program and has a 10-year-old son who rages and gets angry. Aged 2 son slaps, pinches, and rips. He’s a little bully. Adopted daughter won’t open up about anything and phone is a constanct companion. Entitlement confusion.
Posted by Nicholeen Peck on September 7, 2016
Support Call 8-7-15
This call covers: My family doesn’t like deliberate talk and family meetings don’t really work. Is it even worth it to do them? My age 12 son has become very rude and disrespectful to me and the rest of the family. Name calling and “poop jokes” are normal for him. How do I help him fix it? We’ve just started implementing TSG and our 5-year-old son can’t accept a “no” answer. He runs away and is rude. What do we do? Where do you go to get a lift and/or encouragement? Do you ever feel depressed? And, what do you think about birth order? My 3-year-old runs away when it’s time to go to the calm down spot. What do I do about that?
Posted by Nicholeen Peck on August 11, 2015