Following Instructions | Page 9 | Teaching Self-Government

Following Instructions

Dealing with Friends part 4

How do you help your children stand up for what's right without being "preachy" or "goody-goody"? The most important skill you can teach your child is how to determine what is right and what is wrong and how... more
boy cleaning room

Cleaning a Bedroom

How do you find a good consequence for a thre-year-old who won't participate in cleaning a shared bedroom? This mother explained to me of her struggle with this issue. This is the advice I gave her. ... more

Is Hovering Necessary?

Hovering gives a message of not trusting.  If he thinks that you don't trust him, he will think of himself as a dishonest person based upon your behaviors.  Hovering is also a form of a power struggle. So,... more
boy waiting

He Won't Clean His Room?

I'm having trouble figuring out a good consequence beyond time out for my 3 yr old.  He and his brother who just turned 6 share a room.  I gave them an instruction to clean their room this morning, and he lef... more
Happy and sad face girl

Do You See What I See?

Over the last year, my niece has gone through a change.  The once happy, helpful girl changed into a whiny, depressed, girl that didn't look at life the same.  One day I got left home with the all the childre... more
Father sending child to her room

Speed Things Up

"My daughter takes 10 minutes to actually say 'OK' to an instruction.  How do I speed things up?" If it's taking 10 minutes for the daughter to say "Okay" to an instruction, then she is having a power struggl... more
Little boy folding his arms and sulking

When To Give Consequences And Do Corrections

When and how do you give consequences?  For example, if you instruct your son to go clean his room (assuming you've prepped him for accepting a consequence) and he whines and says, "I don't want to do it... more
Broom, dustpan, and child's feet

Why Not?

I instructed my daughter to sweep the floor.  She said, “OK Mom, but I don’t know how.”    This surprised me.  She had seen me sweep the floor so many times, that I forgot she might not even know ho... more
Child pouting

Helping Young Children Accept "No" Answers

"Nicholeen, I was wondering how you teach these principles to the younger children.  My children are (almost) 8, (almost) 6, 3.5, 20 months, and a 2 week old.  (not that I expect to be doing this with the new... more
Girl stealing cookie

Certain Consequences For Certain Behaviors

A blog reader wrote: 1 - We don't have a "rule" or certain consequence set up for every behavior in the book (nor do we want so many specific rules!)  So, I'm wondering if "just-plain-not-doing-what-you-know-... more