“But what if they just keep talking back and are driving me crazy,” a mother asked me while I was instructing a group of parents on how to teach their children to accept “no” answers.The mother of three told the group she knew she needed help becausesometimes she feels so crazy, or out of control, when she’s around her children that she looks forward to going to work instead of being at home with the family.I immediately noticed that wanting to go to work when things got rough at home was really just a desire to run away from a problem she didn’t feel quite prepared to solve.This mother was missing vital tools and honest perspective needed to stop herself and her children from going crazy or running away.Children most often develop the habit of talking back to parents in disrespectful ways because the behavior is occasionally tolerated. Parents unknowingly …
Posted by Monica Pond on October 19, 2019
When andhow do yougiveconsequences? For example,if youinstruct yourson to go clean his room (assuming you’ve prepped him for accepting a consequence) and he whines and says, “I don’t want to do it right now.” What do you say?
Posted by Nicholeen Peck on June 27, 2008
“Look Mom, this water bottle has a description. The water is described as ‘mouth-watering water,” said Porter with a chuckle. “This water calls itself smart, but I’m not sure that description seems very smart,” he added. This was too much for me. I completely broke down into a laughing attack over this ridiculous notion that this water I was drinking was so good because it was “mouth-watering.” After I couldn’t stop laughing, then all my children and their friends who were visiting broke into laughter that lasted about 15 minutes. Following our group laugh attack over the water, other silly stories were shared including one of our favorite books, “A Triune Tale of Diminutive Swine.” Then more and more laughs… Laughing draws people in and makes them feel comfortable and part of the group. It was especially good that we ended up having so many laughs that night because we …
Posted by Monica Pond on June 1, 2021
My daughter, Paije, and I were asked to do a podcast with Karen Trifiletti, the host of “I Believe.” This video is a portion of that podcast on the subject of SODAS.
Posted by Nicholeen Peck on February 7, 2014
How does 24 hours loss of privilegeswork in your house? Let’s say a13 year old boydoesn’t want to get on board. Buthe shouldn’t be allowed to just hole up in his room away from the rest of the family!However, I have foundthat sending him to sit on his bed is the most effective thingthat can be done. Consequences are so individual. I don’t expe
Posted by Nicholeen Peck on July 17, 2008
This call covers: What to do when children CHOOSE to lose all privliges What to do if youare abully-style parent How to love your children inspite of yourself Extra chores for super young children Dealing with ODD Children/ODD or just defiance?
Posted by Nicholeen Peck on June 15, 2017
10 modules including over 70 lessons Downloadable PDF workbook pages for each lesson Group live mentoring calls with certified TSG mentor Weekly Support Group calls with Nicholeen Downloadable version of the cue cards, meeting forms, and choices map. Teaching Self-Government 15-Lesson Family Tutorial included FREE (Viewable on the website, no DVD) Online videos of actual parenting interactions Lifetime access to online course materials More in-depth understanding of self-government and personal self-mastery Stronger relationship strategies for husband/wife relationship Suggested assignments for implementation success Please note that the course material is online. No physical materials will be included. If you also wish to have the Parenting: A House United book or any other physical materials we recommend the Parenting University Package or Parenting Essentials Package.
Posted by David Eggertsen on June 28, 2020
“Hi Nicholeen, I have been working hard to implement the principles you have taught me. I have seen a huge difference in how I parent and respond to my children. However, there has been one side effect I was not expecting. Because of my poor parenting in the past, they have developed a habit of responding with ange
Posted by Nicholeen Peck on December 6, 2017
“My husband works at a jail and just a few weeks ago a man we both know from school and church was brought in on sexual charges. His niece was supposedly the victim. Both of us were very surprised, as we wouldn’t have expected him of doing such a thing. Whether he is guilty or not, we will probably never know.However, after discussing it, we both thought that not only is it important to try to protect our children from this type of thing, we also need to take steps to protect OURSELVES and our own reputations.”
Posted by Nicholeen Peck on June 24, 2008
This time of year it is customary tothink about how to become better than we already are. Why would wewant to become better? Honestly, in this world where bad often seemsgood and good is often talked about as bad it is ironic that we stilladhere to a tradition where we focus on becoming better than we are.The very idea of becoming better suggests that this life is full ofpurpose. That we are supposed to live a specific mission that onlywe can live; that we are here for a reason. Most people, especially in their youth,have a feeling that they are important. They sense that they aresupposed to become great at something. They look to the future withhope and passion. Young people live for dreams and follow theirpassions. Then, as life goes on, many adults stopfollowing their dreams. They start believing that the “reality”of this life is that each day is …
Posted by Nicholeen Peck on December 31, 2013
“Cause and effect is as absolute and undeviating in the hidden realm of thought as in the world of visible and material things.” We cannot change cause and effect no matter how hard we try.Bad will always produce bad for someone and good will always produce good for someone.The law of cause and effect is true, even if the someone isn’t the person doing the good or the bad.
Posted by Nicholeen Peck on February 1, 2018
Faster isn’t always better. In a world of convenience and lack of time, great efforts have been made to save time and increase efficiency for us all. Innovators have created devices and processes that increase our quality of life and give us more time for the important things. But, faster isn’t better when people are concerned. Take parenting, for instance. Every time I speak to people about teaching their children how to change their hearts toward self-governing their behaviors, parents will say, “How long is this going to take? I’m in crisis right now.” To this question I speak the truth: “Learning to govern yourself isn’t a trick or quick fix; it is a lifelong pursuit for children and parents. In fact, it is the most important of our life’s accomplishments.” I suppose this could turn people off, but it shouldn’t. When a person talks of changing a heart, or …
Posted by Nicholeen Peck on April 5, 2016