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Calm

Support Call 10-23-15

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This call covers:

  • Upcoming Schedule changes. Mark them on your calendar!
  • My son can’t seem to accept a chore during playtime. He’s fine when it’s chore time, but other than that, he has a breakdown when I ask him to do even the simplest things.
  • How old should my children be for me to give them chores? When can they do them?
  • One of my sons goes to and through the Rule of Three often. But, it seems that the more calm I am, the more angry he is. How do I fix that?

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Support Call 10-14-15

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This call covers:

  • Children age 6 and 3. How do I know what their traits are at this age?
  • I’m having a hard time sharing our family vision with my older children who are no longer living with us. Any ideas?
  • My husband doesn’t help me implement new skills and leaves it to me. My 12-year-old son thinks he’s a bad child. And, I’m trying to find God’s will for me and my family.

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Support Call 8-7-15

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This call covers:

  • My family doesn’t like deliberate talk and family meetings don’t really work. Is it even worth it to do them?
  • My age 12 son has become very rude and disrespectful to me and the rest of the family. Name calling and “poop jokes” are normal for him. How do I help him fix it?
  • We’ve just started implementing TSG and our 5-year-old son can’t accept a “no” answer. He runs away and is rude. What do we do?
  • Where do you go to get a lift and/or encouragement? Do you ever feel depressed? And, what do you think about birth order?
  • My 3-year-old runs away when it’s time to go to the calm down spot. What do I do about that?

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Support Call 7-31-15

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This call covers:

  • Teaching homeschool while keeping the house clean. How do I keep it all going?
  • We’re new to TSG and have 4 children. Our 14-year-old is struggling with following instructions and being calm. What do we do?
  • My aged 14 son has come back to live with me after being a whole year with his dad and in public school with no boundaries. He says he hates me, won’t do anything I say, and does anything he can to show me how much he dislikes me. How do I help him?
  • What happens when you’ve gone through the Rule of Three and your child isstillout of control. What do I do?

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Support Call 4-8-15

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This call covers:

  • Age 7 son who is high-spirited and does everything big, especially emotions. Isa good effort is ever enough, or do you have to get all the way calm, be able to make eye contact, and everything?
  • Age 7 daughter has issues with snooping, stealing candy, wanting to wear cosmetics on errands, and won’t accept consequences at all.
  • Nursing still at 10 months old. It’s getting kind of awkward. What do I do?
  • 7 Habits Of Highly Effective People and life missions

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stressed

Stressed Out To Chilled Out ~ My True Story

7 Comments / All, TSG Principles, Using TSG Skills /

I am not a stress out type person. My part ‘yellow’ personality usually keeps me rather laid back and happy no matter what troubles come my way. This has been a blessing many times in my life. But, I can feel stress, and sometimes I do. Here is my story of how I conquered the worse case of stress I have had.

Stress And Anxiety Symptoms

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Conference Call 11-16-12

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This call covers:

  • Correcting behavior while traveling and what to do when you have different standards from the people you are visiting.Falling off the TSG wagon and getting back up.What to do when you spouse isn’t on board.
  • 14 year old manipulative son and Disagreeing Appropriately
  • Loss of privileges on a Sunday. Daughter plans her loss of privileges to happen when she can’t lose them.
  • Discouragement
  • When and how to teach the family the TSG program
  • Children’s friends who keep bringing electronic devices to the house. What to do about it.
  • Role Play Ideas for making it more fun, staying away from bribing and the upcoming video
  • Pulling yourself out of a slump

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Conference Call 4-8-11

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After her brother’s wedding Nicholeen shares a nugget of wisdom“Receiving your Spouse”. She discusses the importance of receiving and improving your relationship with your spouse, gives an assessment, and discusses the3 Types of Communication.

Questions:

  • My husband thinks I am too much of a softy and that kids need more aggressive measures than just talking about it. So do I go his way or make him come my way?
  • My children are 10, 12, and14 year olds but they act like 3 year olds. The feeling in the house is total contention there’s been fighting, squabbling, teasing, sibling rivalry, they are being destructive.My goal to stay calm. What do I do?
  • Talking helps me understand my thoughts.What do I do when there is something I need to talk concerning my spouse? I know you mentioned that we shouldn’t talk behind our spouses back?
  • We are trying to implement things in your book. I have older kids who don’t care for the changes. My husband says we need to get back to core and back to the relationships with them. How do you suggest we start implementing Self-Government?

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Calm In A Hurry?

8 Comments / All, Relationships /

The opposite of calm is hurry. If you feel like you have to hurry all the time, then you will never be calm. Also, if you feel like you have to hurry through your teaching interactions with your children then you will also have a harder time staying calm. Don’t let your desire for being efficient ruin your ability to be calm. The great philosopher William Jordan said:

The first sermon in the world was preached at the Creation. It was a Divine protest against Hurry. It was a Divine object lesson of perfect law, perfect plan, perfect order, perfect method. Six days of work carefully planned, scheduled and completed were followed by,–rest.

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time out

Tips For Using Time-out With Toddlers

9 Comments / All, Toddlers (0-4), Using TSG Skills /

“My 2yo has started crying a LOT the past few days. Over every little thing. Nothing is different physically or environmentally that I can tell. He already has his 2yo molars, too.. He’s just been crying about everything that he doesn’t like, with some pretty good tantrums thrown in the mix of the average crying. I tried holding him in timeout (he’s never stayed in time out on his own so far), but he screamed and threw a serious tantrum the whole time.. which wouldn’t be a problem for me except that I have to take care of the other kids, too! I tried holding him in our time-out spot until he was done with the tantrum so I could praise him for being happy, etc., but after 40 minutes of continuous screaming, my baby was also crying, needing to be fed, and the other young kids had destroyed the basement. At that point I just took him to his bed to finish his crying fit. So I’m thinking the holding in time out option might not work for us. Yesterday and today I’ve started just taking him to his room when he starts having a breaking down crying fit. What would you suggest? Do you think I should just take him to his room every time he cries? Or should I try

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A strict parent?

1 Comment / All, Relationships /

I was recently asked if I thought I was a strict parent. I’ve never liked the word strict, because I associat it with a parent who yells a lot, is stern looking and engages in power struggles. So, in response to the question, I said, “I wouldn’t use the word strict to describe me, but I would say I am firm.” I shared these thoughts about the word strict with a wise friend of mine. She looked me in the eye and said, “You are wrong about people who are strict. A strict parent DOESN’T HAVE TO YELL.” All of a sudden I wondered if the semantics of the word strict have been chang

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little boy crying

4 Year-Old Stress

Leave a Comment / All, Children (4-10), Relationships, Toddlers (0-4) /

We got home late. My four year old fell asleep on the way home. After waking up, he came in to go potty, get dressed and go to bed. From the bathroom I heard crying. He was in there for a long time. He was in the bathroom trying to clean up a mess that he had made in his pants.It was very stressful and disturbing to him to find a dirty pants problem. This stress along with his extreme tiredness made him very sad and he just couldn’t help crying.

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