Assertive Communication | Page 10 | Teaching Self-Government

Assertive Communication

How Do You Get Your Way?

How Do You Get Your Way? --Power Struggles or Good Communication

In May 2009 I allowed the BBC Britain to bring two troubled British teens to my home to make a show called “The World’s Strictest Parents.”  They brought me two seventeen year olds named Hannah and James.  For two days Hannah and James had tantrums and tried every way they could think of to initiate power struggles and force us to become aggressive.  This is generally called, “button pushing.”  What they didn’t know was that I got rid of all my buttons long ago. 

Tips For Using Time-out With Toddlers

"My 2yo has started crying a LOT the past few days.  Over every little thing.   Nothing is different physically or environmentally that I can tell.  He already has his 2yo molars, too..   He's just been c... more
Father sending child to her room

Speed Things Up

"My daughter takes 10 minutes to actually say 'OK' to an instruction.  How do I speed things up?" If it's taking 10 minutes for the daughter to say "Okay" to an instruction, then she is having a power struggl... more
Girl explaining something to Dad

The Why's To Disagreeing Appropriately

When I see my children are getting frustrated, I gently remind them that they can disagree appropriately.  I even tell my children exactly how to disagree with ME sometimes.  The point of the skill is to lear... more
Broom, dustpan, and child's feet

Why Not?

I instructed my daughter to sweep the floor.  She said, “OK Mom, but I don’t know how.”    This surprised me.  She had seen me sweep the floor so many times, that I forgot she might not even know ho... more
Birds and bees

When do you talk about "it"?

I have to ask it because it’s something I struggle with talking about to my kids . . . when do you talk to your children about sex?  How do you go about it so that they understand that sex is actually a goo... more
Child with hand to ear

Don't ...

      A lot of children have selective hearing; have you noticed?  Some of this selective hearing is planned and some isn't.  They really don't hear us correctly sometimes.  We can do something to make... more

Are You Assertive?

If you are going to effectively learn how to govern yourself, you have to be assertive.  Teaching Self Government is essentially teaching how to act assertively as oppose to agressively or passively.  Are you... more

Tell Them What to Say

Even after we teach our children how to follow an instruction or how to accept a NO answer, our children will sometimes forget that they can choose to say, "OK".  The other day I told my son that he needed to... more

How Did I Learn Self-Government?

In the year 1998, my husband decided to make a career change which involved lower pay and additional schooling.  We had already decided that I needed to stay home to raise our two children, so we didn’t exac... more