I have attended your classes at home school conferences and bought the mp3;s. I am currently purchasing your book, however, I am in crisis. I have a 17 rd old son that has been homeschooled since fourth grade. We originally took him out due to severe depression. This is something he struggles with. He has always done well in school. He went to the public high school for his freshman year. He was top of the class academically but he hated every minute of it and we allowed him to come back to home school for the past two years. About six months ago I could see that he was clinically depressed and we found a counselor to help us through that. It turns out he was introduced to pornography at school and became addicted and the guilt has caused him to lose about a year of his life. We are dealing with this issue and he is doing very well and continues to receive counseling with us. The crisis is that he cant make a decision about anything in his life and he seems to have no self control. He wants us to tell him every little thing to do and takes no responsibility. He takes 8 hours to do simple science due to the fact that if I walk out of his earshot he will immediately waste time doing anything else. It is so frustrating that we have to literally babysit him and that he needs us to. I am at my wits end with him and feel like throwing in the towel and sending him to boarding school. Of course, my rational mind knows that I must clean up this mess with him and no one else. Can you please give me some direction on how to get this kid to take back his life and not put us in the position of jailers.
I want you to know that it is okay for your son to fail. We all do it. Maybe he has been protected from some failures in the past. I don't know. Either way, ultimately he will have to really understand the principle of learning from mistakes and bad decisions. I wonder if he has a false sense of reality and how he fits into things. Maybe he thinks failure isn't acceptable. Let him fail and don't show any emotion about it, just go on with the regular routine and cause and effect system. Don't be emotional. Then praise the good things. After that you have to just trust in the natural learning process and let him take whatever time he needs. The whole false reality thing is another reason to turn off the TV and computer etc for a long while. It will get in his way of running his own life. Tip** You mentioned that he wastes time. Time wasting isn't necessarily a sign of depression. It could just be a sign of laziness. Maybe you should go back to the core phase of his education. Work, work, work, together of course. If you are not familiar with the phases of education you may want to read a great book called A Thomas Jefferson Education by Oliver Van DeMille. It is a great help. I am sure we could talk at length about his behaviors and certain situations, but for now, try these things. If you need more help you can always schedule a mentor call with me for $50 per hour.